@
Violet
A man walked into the doctors office with a carrots in his ears and broccoli out his nose.
The doctor says "I can tell you right now, you're not eating right!"
it doesnt matter though the guy carrot hear him.
@
Violet
A man walked into the doctors office with a carrots in his ears and broccoli out his nose.
The doctor says "I can tell you right now, you're not eating right!"
it doesnt matter though the guy carrot hear him.
What did the dog say to the hotdog bun?
Are you pure bread? XD
What did the dog say to the hotdog bun?
Are you pure bread? XD
@
Violet
Okay this is an intense string of 3 related jokes so bear with me.
Q: What's the difference between an elephant and a prune?
A: Prunes are purple.
Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants running down the jungle path?
A: Here come the elephants.
Q: What did Jane say when she saw the elephants running down the jungle path?
A: Here come the prunes. She was color blind.
This joke has been brought to you by my father's super lame joke arsenal. :'D This is actually a wonderful idea for a raffle 10/10 would recommend
@
Violet
Okay this is an intense string of 3 related jokes so bear with me.
Q: What's the difference between an elephant and a prune?
A: Prunes are purple.
Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants running down the jungle path?
A: Here come the elephants.
Q: What did Jane say when she saw the elephants running down the jungle path?
A: Here come the prunes. She was color blind.
This joke has been brought to you by my father's super lame joke arsenal. :'D This is actually a wonderful idea for a raffle 10/10 would recommend
ok ok, i think this is a good one..
What do you call a muscular man wearing a nacho hat?
A MACHO MAN!!!
ok ok, i think this is a good one..
What do you call a muscular man wearing a nacho hat?
A MACHO MAN!!!
@
violet
A man walks into a pub and orders six double vodkas.
The barman says "Bad day?"
To which the man replies, "Yes, I just found out my brother is gay and I'm not sure how to feel about that."
"Oh, you'll get used to it." replies the barman.
The following day the man re-enters and again orders double vodkas. "Not another bad day?" asks the barman.
"yes," replies the man, "I just found out my other brother is gay too."
"It'll be fine. Here, have an extra one on the house." offers the barman.
Two days later the man returns to the pub, looking more depressed than usual. He sits down and orders six double vodkas.
The barman asks, "For God's sake, does no one in your family like women?"
"Yes," the man replies "My wife does."
And in addition to that just because why the hell not:
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants.
The bartender asks what it's doing there and the pirate replies, "Yaharg, it's drivin' me nuts!"
@
violet
A man walks into a pub and orders six double vodkas.
The barman says "Bad day?"
To which the man replies, "Yes, I just found out my brother is gay and I'm not sure how to feel about that."
"Oh, you'll get used to it." replies the barman.
The following day the man re-enters and again orders double vodkas. "Not another bad day?" asks the barman.
"yes," replies the man, "I just found out my other brother is gay too."
"It'll be fine. Here, have an extra one on the house." offers the barman.
Two days later the man returns to the pub, looking more depressed than usual. He sits down and orders six double vodkas.
The barman asks, "For God's sake, does no one in your family like women?"
"Yes," the man replies "My wife does."
And in addition to that just because why the hell not:
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants.
The bartender asks what it's doing there and the pirate replies, "Yaharg, it's drivin' me nuts!"
One night a woman invited over some neighbors for dinner. When her guests and family sat down to eat she turned to her six year old daughter and asked if she would like to say grace. The daughter drowned and said, "I don't know what to say."
Her mother offered, "Just say what mommy said when she prayed last time."
The daughter thought a monent, then bowed her head, folded her hands and said, "Dear Lord, why did I invite all these people to dinner?"
It's not that good but my mind is just blanking today. I love free creative contests though. It's neat!
One night a woman invited over some neighbors for dinner. When her guests and family sat down to eat she turned to her six year old daughter and asked if she would like to say grace. The daughter drowned and said, "I don't know what to say."
Her mother offered, "Just say what mommy said when she prayed last time."
The daughter thought a monent, then bowed her head, folded her hands and said, "Dear Lord, why did I invite all these people to dinner?"
It's not that good but my mind is just blanking today. I love free creative contests though. It's neat!
@
Matches
Ooh, nice one! 3 tickets for you and compliments to the wonderful man who used to tell those jokes.
@
Cappilette
Why yes, yes I do.
@
Flaghead
Ahaha, got you down for two tickets. Thank you!
@
bink5bink5
I giggled. CB Got you down for two.
@
scoutandabout
Oh gosh. xD Those jokes. Poor Jane, poor prunephants.
Written down for three of them tickets.
@
werewolfmaster
Haha. He'd look pretty ridiculous though. xD have you down for two.
@
rosenight
3 tickets, I lol'd. xD Thank you for that!
@
Lestenna
Eeeh, pretty good I'd say! Definitely never heard that one. Have you for three tickets. c: Thank you!
@
Matches
Ooh, nice one! 3 tickets for you and compliments to the wonderful man who used to tell those jokes.
@
Cappilette
Why yes, yes I do.
@
Flaghead
Ahaha, got you down for two tickets. Thank you!
@
bink5bink5
I giggled. CB Got you down for two.
@
scoutandabout
Oh gosh. xD Those jokes. Poor Jane, poor prunephants.
Written down for three of them tickets.
@
werewolfmaster
Haha. He'd look pretty ridiculous though. xD have you down for two.
@
rosenight
3 tickets, I lol'd. xD Thank you for that!
@
Lestenna
Eeeh, pretty good I'd say! Definitely never heard that one. Have you for three tickets. c: Thank you!
@ Violet
A man was sitting in his kitchen, reading his paper one morning when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him over the head with her frying pan.
"What was that for?" The man cried as he rubbed his aching head.
"What was that piece of paper with the name Marylou doing in your pants pocket?" The wife asked him, still livid.
"Oh honey remember when I went to the horse races a few weeks back? Marylou was one of the horses I bet on."
His wife is satisfied, apologizes for the swatting and a week goes by.
The man is once again sitting at the kitchen table reading his newspaper when his wife whacks him over the head with her frying pan.
"What was that for?" The man shouts again.
His wife replies...
"Your horse called."
@ Violet
A man was sitting in his kitchen, reading his paper one morning when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him over the head with her frying pan.
"What was that for?" The man cried as he rubbed his aching head.
"What was that piece of paper with the name Marylou doing in your pants pocket?" The wife asked him, still livid.
"Oh honey remember when I went to the horse races a few weeks back? Marylou was one of the horses I bet on."
His wife is satisfied, apologizes for the swatting and a week goes by.
The man is once again sitting at the kitchen table reading his newspaper when his wife whacks him over the head with her frying pan.
"What was that for?" The man shouts again.
His wife replies...
"Your horse called."
