never read acotar but remember the big purple soap
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TOPIC | Horrible books you've read?
I've read a lot of awful stuff, but I think my most-loathed is The Stench of Honolulu, which is a very obscure book that should stay that way.
The core of the humor is that the main character is a terrible human being who ruins the lives of people around him, and that Honolulu smells like farts.
The Evil MacGuffin is a cursed shard of wood? or something? that makes things dissolve and also smell like farts.
One of the most-repeated jokes in the story is that Honolulu has a sister city whose name is spelled like a foul substance, but that city smells better than Honolulu, because Honolulu smells like farts, and it's funny because Honolulu is not spelled like a foul substance, yet the sister city (remember: foul substance) would be expected to smell worse because of its name, yet it does not. Or maybe the joke is "Honolulu smells worse than Foul Substance!!! HAHA GOT YOU, "FOUL SUBSTANCE" IS THE NAME OF A CITY". I saw that joke like a dozen times and I don't know.
Maybe it's some kind of travel in-joke I'm too poor to understand? Maybe Honolulu really does smell so bad, and people are so in denial about it, that it stays funny no matter how, or how many times, it's mentioned. I don't know. I don't care.
Holy moly, all that whinging and I'm only as far as the "smel bad" jokes? But I feel kind of dirty having given the book even this much thought, so please just take my word for it containing so, so much more. At least every third sentence is part of a joke, but I could count on one hand the number that worked. Reading this was agony in the same way watching someone fail a standup routine is, except, like, they think they're hilarious and are friends with the owner, so they're gonna be up there farting into the mic all night.
0/10, this book broke me.
The core of the humor is that the main character is a terrible human being who ruins the lives of people around him, and that Honolulu smells like farts.
The Evil MacGuffin is a cursed shard of wood? or something? that makes things dissolve and also smell like farts.
One of the most-repeated jokes in the story is that Honolulu has a sister city whose name is spelled like a foul substance, but that city smells better than Honolulu, because Honolulu smells like farts, and it's funny because Honolulu is not spelled like a foul substance, yet the sister city (remember: foul substance) would be expected to smell worse because of its name, yet it does not. Or maybe the joke is "Honolulu smells worse than Foul Substance!!! HAHA GOT YOU, "FOUL SUBSTANCE" IS THE NAME OF A CITY". I saw that joke like a dozen times and I don't know.
Maybe it's some kind of travel in-joke I'm too poor to understand? Maybe Honolulu really does smell so bad, and people are so in denial about it, that it stays funny no matter how, or how many times, it's mentioned. I don't know. I don't care.
Holy moly, all that whinging and I'm only as far as the "smel bad" jokes? But I feel kind of dirty having given the book even this much thought, so please just take my word for it containing so, so much more. At least every third sentence is part of a joke, but I could count on one hand the number that worked. Reading this was agony in the same way watching someone fail a standup routine is, except, like, they think they're hilarious and are friends with the owner, so they're gonna be up there farting into the mic all night.
0/10, this book broke me.
I've read a lot of awful stuff, but I think my most-loathed is The Stench of Honolulu, which is a very obscure book that should stay that way.
The core of the humor is that the main character is a terrible human being who ruins the lives of people around him, and that Honolulu smells like farts.
The Evil MacGuffin is a cursed shard of wood? or something? that makes things dissolve and also smell like farts.
One of the most-repeated jokes in the story is that Honolulu has a sister city whose name is spelled like a foul substance, but that city smells better than Honolulu, because Honolulu smells like farts, and it's funny because Honolulu is not spelled like a foul substance, yet the sister city (remember: foul substance) would be expected to smell worse because of its name, yet it does not. Or maybe the joke is "Honolulu smells worse than Foul Substance!!! HAHA GOT YOU, "FOUL SUBSTANCE" IS THE NAME OF A CITY". I saw that joke like a dozen times and I don't know.
Maybe it's some kind of travel in-joke I'm too poor to understand? Maybe Honolulu really does smell so bad, and people are so in denial about it, that it stays funny no matter how, or how many times, it's mentioned. I don't know. I don't care.
Holy moly, all that whinging and I'm only as far as the "smel bad" jokes? But I feel kind of dirty having given the book even this much thought, so please just take my word for it containing so, so much more. At least every third sentence is part of a joke, but I could count on one hand the number that worked. Reading this was agony in the same way watching someone fail a standup routine is, except, like, they think they're hilarious and are friends with the owner, so they're gonna be up there farting into the mic all night.
0/10, this book broke me.
The core of the humor is that the main character is a terrible human being who ruins the lives of people around him, and that Honolulu smells like farts.
The Evil MacGuffin is a cursed shard of wood? or something? that makes things dissolve and also smell like farts.
One of the most-repeated jokes in the story is that Honolulu has a sister city whose name is spelled like a foul substance, but that city smells better than Honolulu, because Honolulu smells like farts, and it's funny because Honolulu is not spelled like a foul substance, yet the sister city (remember: foul substance) would be expected to smell worse because of its name, yet it does not. Or maybe the joke is "Honolulu smells worse than Foul Substance!!! HAHA GOT YOU, "FOUL SUBSTANCE" IS THE NAME OF A CITY". I saw that joke like a dozen times and I don't know.
Maybe it's some kind of travel in-joke I'm too poor to understand? Maybe Honolulu really does smell so bad, and people are so in denial about it, that it stays funny no matter how, or how many times, it's mentioned. I don't know. I don't care.
Holy moly, all that whinging and I'm only as far as the "smel bad" jokes? But I feel kind of dirty having given the book even this much thought, so please just take my word for it containing so, so much more. At least every third sentence is part of a joke, but I could count on one hand the number that worked. Reading this was agony in the same way watching someone fail a standup routine is, except, like, they think they're hilarious and are friends with the owner, so they're gonna be up there farting into the mic all night.
0/10, this book broke me.
[quote name="LoversMasque" date="2020-12-14 12:35:12" ]
never read acotar but remember the big purple soap
[/quote]
I’ve heard of it. And it was unlicensed, to be fair. But yeah, I read it for the “plot” in high school. Looking back… how did I not see what a train wreck it was?
LoversMasque wrote on 2020-12-14 12:35:12:
never read acotar but remember the big purple soap
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo... I literally forced myself to finish that book after several tries. A friend said it got better after some of the beginning stuff, but nah. Just blargh and it dragged on.
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo... I literally forced myself to finish that book after several tries. A friend said it got better after some of the beginning stuff, but nah. Just blargh and it dragged on.
Z for Zachariah.
I had to read it during high school and it was just... harrowing, stupid and pointless to me. It gave me some really yuck vibes and made me and some of my friends super uncomfortable. There was no real moral, it wasn't very fun to read and overall it read like someone's weird freaky fantasy. The first bit was enjoyable, reading about how the MC figured out how to survive and use the resources of the valley, but the minute mr freaky scientist came in it went way downhill
Of Mice And Men
i know its a ~claaaassiccc~ and all but man this book read like trash. The moral was depressing and as someone who has struggled with disabilities it just .. left a bad taste in my mouth tbh? It was a drag to get through and the ending felt pretty predictable. I don't get the hype at all.
Inheritance series (tentative add)
Don't get me wrong, i love the series! as a disclaimer i havent finished it yet, but it has been one heck of a slog. The first two books are brilliant! but reading the third and beginning the fourth a lot of the characters become kind of ... overpowered, in a way? it feels predictable and theres no real suspense as to whether or not theyre going to succeed. There's a definite pattern emerging with the characters that goes something like OH NO BIG SCARY BAD THING HAPPEN WHAT DO > uh oh struggle time for suspense blah blah blah 3 chapters of skipping to other characters > OH YEAH THIS IS A SUPER POWERFUL THING I CAN DO FOR WHATEVER REASON WITH ONLY A LITTLE BACKLASH > bam, problem solved > repeat
plus im not super into all the little rambly political parts at the moment, so its been a real slog to get through. and Eragon's whole thing for Arya is making me cringe every time i read about it haha. I just feel the characters are becoming overpowered in the point ive reached (although Paolini's magic system is amazing and the universe and its rules are captivating!) and the plot is getting a little repetitive, so I've hit a bit of a standstill about a quarter of the way into the fourth book :/
I had to read it during high school and it was just... harrowing, stupid and pointless to me. It gave me some really yuck vibes and made me and some of my friends super uncomfortable. There was no real moral, it wasn't very fun to read and overall it read like someone's weird freaky fantasy. The first bit was enjoyable, reading about how the MC figured out how to survive and use the resources of the valley, but the minute mr freaky scientist came in it went way downhill
Of Mice And Men
i know its a ~claaaassiccc~ and all but man this book read like trash. The moral was depressing and as someone who has struggled with disabilities it just .. left a bad taste in my mouth tbh? It was a drag to get through and the ending felt pretty predictable. I don't get the hype at all.
Inheritance series (tentative add)
Don't get me wrong, i love the series! as a disclaimer i havent finished it yet, but it has been one heck of a slog. The first two books are brilliant! but reading the third and beginning the fourth a lot of the characters become kind of ... overpowered, in a way? it feels predictable and theres no real suspense as to whether or not theyre going to succeed. There's a definite pattern emerging with the characters that goes something like OH NO BIG SCARY BAD THING HAPPEN WHAT DO > uh oh struggle time for suspense blah blah blah 3 chapters of skipping to other characters > OH YEAH THIS IS A SUPER POWERFUL THING I CAN DO FOR WHATEVER REASON WITH ONLY A LITTLE BACKLASH > bam, problem solved > repeat
plus im not super into all the little rambly political parts at the moment, so its been a real slog to get through. and Eragon's whole thing for Arya is making me cringe every time i read about it haha. I just feel the characters are becoming overpowered in the point ive reached (although Paolini's magic system is amazing and the universe and its rules are captivating!) and the plot is getting a little repetitive, so I've hit a bit of a standstill about a quarter of the way into the fourth book :/
Z for Zachariah.
I had to read it during high school and it was just... harrowing, stupid and pointless to me. It gave me some really yuck vibes and made me and some of my friends super uncomfortable. There was no real moral, it wasn't very fun to read and overall it read like someone's weird freaky fantasy. The first bit was enjoyable, reading about how the MC figured out how to survive and use the resources of the valley, but the minute mr freaky scientist came in it went way downhill
Of Mice And Men
i know its a ~claaaassiccc~ and all but man this book read like trash. The moral was depressing and as someone who has struggled with disabilities it just .. left a bad taste in my mouth tbh? It was a drag to get through and the ending felt pretty predictable. I don't get the hype at all.
Inheritance series (tentative add)
Don't get me wrong, i love the series! as a disclaimer i havent finished it yet, but it has been one heck of a slog. The first two books are brilliant! but reading the third and beginning the fourth a lot of the characters become kind of ... overpowered, in a way? it feels predictable and theres no real suspense as to whether or not theyre going to succeed. There's a definite pattern emerging with the characters that goes something like OH NO BIG SCARY BAD THING HAPPEN WHAT DO > uh oh struggle time for suspense blah blah blah 3 chapters of skipping to other characters > OH YEAH THIS IS A SUPER POWERFUL THING I CAN DO FOR WHATEVER REASON WITH ONLY A LITTLE BACKLASH > bam, problem solved > repeat
plus im not super into all the little rambly political parts at the moment, so its been a real slog to get through. and Eragon's whole thing for Arya is making me cringe every time i read about it haha. I just feel the characters are becoming overpowered in the point ive reached (although Paolini's magic system is amazing and the universe and its rules are captivating!) and the plot is getting a little repetitive, so I've hit a bit of a standstill about a quarter of the way into the fourth book :/
I had to read it during high school and it was just... harrowing, stupid and pointless to me. It gave me some really yuck vibes and made me and some of my friends super uncomfortable. There was no real moral, it wasn't very fun to read and overall it read like someone's weird freaky fantasy. The first bit was enjoyable, reading about how the MC figured out how to survive and use the resources of the valley, but the minute mr freaky scientist came in it went way downhill
Of Mice And Men
i know its a ~claaaassiccc~ and all but man this book read like trash. The moral was depressing and as someone who has struggled with disabilities it just .. left a bad taste in my mouth tbh? It was a drag to get through and the ending felt pretty predictable. I don't get the hype at all.
Inheritance series (tentative add)
Don't get me wrong, i love the series! as a disclaimer i havent finished it yet, but it has been one heck of a slog. The first two books are brilliant! but reading the third and beginning the fourth a lot of the characters become kind of ... overpowered, in a way? it feels predictable and theres no real suspense as to whether or not theyre going to succeed. There's a definite pattern emerging with the characters that goes something like OH NO BIG SCARY BAD THING HAPPEN WHAT DO > uh oh struggle time for suspense blah blah blah 3 chapters of skipping to other characters > OH YEAH THIS IS A SUPER POWERFUL THING I CAN DO FOR WHATEVER REASON WITH ONLY A LITTLE BACKLASH > bam, problem solved > repeat
plus im not super into all the little rambly political parts at the moment, so its been a real slog to get through. and Eragon's whole thing for Arya is making me cringe every time i read about it haha. I just feel the characters are becoming overpowered in the point ive reached (although Paolini's magic system is amazing and the universe and its rules are captivating!) and the plot is getting a little repetitive, so I've hit a bit of a standstill about a quarter of the way into the fourth book :/
I don't remember the exact name of the story (since it was part of an anthology collection) but it was the most boring, bland horror story I've ever read in my life. also the amount of crude humor and weird talk about the internet just made me turn into a grandpa.
I don't remember the exact name of the story (since it was part of an anthology collection) but it was the most boring, bland horror story I've ever read in my life. also the amount of crude humor and weird talk about the internet just made me turn into a grandpa.
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qe/qem fr+3   
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Okay so I know I'm punting on a classic revered by the world but:
Six Metamorphoses by Ovid.
Man, that book was hard to get through. Each story constantly flowed from one to the next and not in the good way.
Six Metamorphoses by Ovid.
Man, that book was hard to get through. Each story constantly flowed from one to the next and not in the good way.
Okay so I know I'm punting on a classic revered by the world but:
Six Metamorphoses by Ovid.
Man, that book was hard to get through. Each story constantly flowed from one to the next and not in the good way.
Six Metamorphoses by Ovid.
Man, that book was hard to get through. Each story constantly flowed from one to the next and not in the good way.
-
[quote name="@Quintillion" date="2020-12-13 23:33:55" ]
I'm sorry, but as much as I liked Redwall, significant portions of the series were inaccessible to me because I very swiftly became sick and tired of the author's attempts to sound out a dialect in text format.[/quote]
Burr aye, et be's moighty differcult urtempin' to readen ee's moler doilek. OI do be a luvern it losts tho.
[quote name="@BunnyUnicorn" date="2020-12-04 12:40:30" ]
"The Courtship of Princess Leia". Despite introducing one of my favorite groups of the Star Wars Universe (the Witches of Dathomir, such as Nightsisters), it is just a mess. Even the Star Wars young reader books were written better than that one. [/quote]
For those not aware, that book is basically "Princess Leia is proposed to by a Prince and seriously considers marrying him after knowing him for all of half an hour. Han responds by stealing the Prince's hypnosis ray gun, shooting Leia with it, kidnapping her, and flying her off to a planet he won in a card game to try and seduce her. Leia is of course fine with all of this by the end of the book."
Yeah that one was a flaming mess. I'm glad the only part of it that Star Wars has re-integrated into the canon is the NIghtsister order.
In that vein, I'd like to submit The Dark Nest trilogy as being some of the worst Star Wars I've read. You don't get much more absurd than "Han and Leia's kids along with their friends are kidnapped by giant ants and forced to do mating dances around a campfire."
@Quintillion wrote on 2020-12-13 23:33:55:
I'm sorry, but as much as I liked Redwall, significant portions of the series were inaccessible to me because I very swiftly became sick and tired of the author's attempts to sound out a dialect in text format.
@BunnyUnicorn wrote on 2020-12-04 12:40:30:
"The Courtship of Princess Leia". Despite introducing one of my favorite groups of the Star Wars Universe (the Witches of Dathomir, such as Nightsisters), it is just a mess. Even the Star Wars young reader books were written better than that one.
Yeah that one was a flaming mess. I'm glad the only part of it that Star Wars has re-integrated into the canon is the NIghtsister order.
In that vein, I'd like to submit The Dark Nest trilogy as being some of the worst Star Wars I've read. You don't get much more absurd than "Han and Leia's kids along with their friends are kidnapped by giant ants and forced to do mating dances around a campfire."
