General Discussion

Hello, i hope its ok if i comment on this.

Slight parental abuse mention, religion mention.
i’ve not been diagnosed yet due to my mother denying the fact that i am on the spectrum. Ever since i was born, complete strangers would approach my mother and ask her if i was autistic which she would then deny profusely. I’ve rocked my entire life because it helps me to feel safe and it calms me. I also do it faster when watching/listening to something i really love. Eye contact makes my skin crawl and i’m super sensitive to lights, sounds, touch and certain textures. Theres many pictures of me as a kid shielding my eyes from the sun which my mother would then yell at me for. I have been bullied for liking things ‘too much’ and have been threatened for my hyperfixation to be taken away when i was a kid up to the point i moved out (which was at 22) because my mother thought it was that satan had a hold on me through the plush/game/movie, etc. All my life i’ve felt different but because my mother never got me diagnosed and proceeded to pretend like i was like my brothers is why i’ve only recently have began to suspect its because i’m autistic. With this new discovery i don’t feel like a freak and i don’t feel so alone anymore. I am hoping to one day get diagnosed. Thank you for reading!

Hey, so, can anyone else not eat (or really be near) beans? For me its part of my spectrum. Its texture.

Anyway does anyone else on the spectrum have this? Jc

hello yes you called and i have autism.

after a bit of thinking, and my general ideology of balance, i might actually be around mid-functioning, but closer to high. it might have been nurture rather than nature that caused me to be much more fit for integrating into society compared to my cousin.

anyway, time for the good part: hyperfixations! i'm ESPECIALLY hyperfixated on biology. the only thing on my mind currently is that whole-genome duplication took place in the ancient euarchontoglires, a common ancestor of humans and rodents. i've been hyperfixated on biology for years now. a less prominent but still slappin hyperfixation is the web show bfdi, which i've been obsessing over for two years.
i'm also rather sensitive to sound and light, and am not the most social.

i'm very verbal, but have trouble controlling my voice. i have two states of being, whispering or yelling. that's it. no in between. i can easily show emotions, but i can't easily interpret emotions. i have a very strange sense of time passing and have to count to even get NEAR correctly counting 10 seconds. usually, without counting, i end up with 5 seconds, but i'm getting better at interpreting time. and yeah, jeans are Horrible and I Dislike Them.

for stims, i usually tap my fingers to music. if that's not available, i WILL bite my nails. i will bite my nails as long as i have hands.

overall? i don't mind it. in fact, because of executive dysfunction, it might be the reason i'm still alive to tell you about this. i wouldn't have it any other way.

I'm on the autism spectrum and I have known that for over a decade. I have known I was different than other people ever since I was younger, so when I found out about that I was relieved that I wasn't just imagining my differences from other people.

I have hyperfixations. If I really like something, I won't be able to stop thinking about it and I will be really obsessed. Currently it is any fantasy book I really like. I can often be found reading for more than a few hours straight if I feel okay enough to be reading. I used to have a lot of social anxiety too. This has calmed down some, I'm less afraid to talk to other people now if I know we have something in common. I have never really had a best friend in real life that I told everything to before, just people that I'd sit by and we'd talk about basic things (if we got along) but we never did anything outside of school.

I can't stand television commercials. Don't know if anyone else has this, but I really dislike that they're very loud and flashy and hurt my eyes so I can't look at them. The commercials a few years ago didn't bother me as much; the current commercials bother me to a point that I can't leave the sound on. I just generally always prefer a quiet environment to a noisy one, because I'm more relaxed and can concentrate better. If there's music on, then I can't concentrate at all.

I am also really bothered if anyone touches my back/shoulder/right arm, because I had a pain condition there and even though it's in remission I'm still sensitive. I used to not notice how many people try to comfort others by patting their shoulder, but whenever someone did that to me a year ago I would cry because it hurt so much. I have sensory issues too. If I go to a place and I don't like it (if it has loud music/really bright lights/a smell that bothers me), I will feel really nauseous and tired until I get out of there and then I feel better after at least a few minutes. I don't like driving at all so I stopped practicing before my permit expired because it was very anxiety-causing for me. I get carsick/motionsick a lot too so being in a car alone makes me nervous because I've had bad experiences in cars before.

I'm high functioning. However, I wasn't diagnosed until my sophomore year of high school. My moms knew pretty much since I was a toddler, but every test they did in elementary school didn't determine anything. I've been diagnosed with ADHD since I think kindergarten, so they just thought it was that (and, in all honesty, ADHD and High Functioning Autism are pretty similar and hard to distinguish). It's also a lot harder to diagnose girls than boys (I think the statistic is, out of all those diagnosed, 80% are boys, and 20% are girls).

I'm... Not personally a fan of the functioning labels, but I'm pretty sure I'm autistic, and I've brought it up to a GP. They've referred me to a psych, but who knows how long that'll take to go through, especially now that the Tories have an even bigger majority hhh

But yeah, I hyperfixate/have special interests, I'm terrible in social situations and I'm very sensitive in the sensory department (dabs)

Current interests are JoJo's Bizarre Adventure (if you couldn't tell) and Oingo Boingo, but previous ones have included cats, dogs, rats, music, some specific bands, uhhh... I watched movies on loop as a child and reread Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban god knows how many times

Socially, I'm not... great. I'm quiet and polite, but I just don't feel like I know how to navigate properly? Like, I have no problems reading other people, but knowing what to say and when is difficult, and running off a script feels ingeniune. Small talk is hell.
I do better when other people can initiate/keep conversations going and I'm able to chip in as and when I want to, but I can't keep a verbal conversation afloat on my own unless I'm infodumping :'D I'm also incredibly socially anxious, which I think probably stems from autism along with maybe childhood trauma/gender feels

I am and always have been really sensitive to loud noises and food textures. I used to be a lot worse wrt both of these but I'm still pretty bad. I especially can't deal with loud siren-type noises (I have to put on headphones when the fire alarm goes off because the noise tears right through me and makes me want to drive my head through the wall) or people yelling at each other or arguing, but I think the second may (again) stem also from childhood trauma. Not to say I wasn't sensitive to it anyway, but ouch fdjkvshgjk

I also can't deal with light themes on most websites (Discord's is the WORST, I can't even look at screencaps of it), but that seems to be a very common sentiment across the internet, so I'm not sure if I'm that much more sensitive to light than NTs are /shrug

I have a few things that could probably count as stims also; I kinda wring my hands together and touch my face/neck, and I also bite the skin around my fingernails and pick at spots and scabs on my body. It's probably something I should try to tone down, but I just can't
I'm also pretty sure I have selective mutism and issues with auditory processing, but I'm not 100% certain on those.

For a bit more background, my brother has been diagnosed autistic since he was very young, but he shows it a lot more outwardly than I do. Mum told me that I was coping well in school etc so she didn't think I'd need help or a diagnosis like my brother got, but as I've become an adult I've started having a much harder time because of my social issues (and also burnout) so I asked her about some stuff and she came with me to the GP to seek help. It seems to run in her side of the family, because she's convinced her dad has it too

If I could get rid of my autism, I'm not sure if I would..? It's caused me a lot of grief in my life, and I'd like to be able to not isolate myself, and to be able to enjoy things without becoming SUPER INVESTED ALL THE TIME FOR YEARS, but I think the reason I'm even friends with half of my friends is because our brains are wired similarly. A lot of my friends have either suspected or diagnosed autism, and we all get each other, y'know?

Sup?

I got diagnosed pretty young and was in therapy throughout primary school, but I worked for years to “mask,” like I even read my parents’ autism spectrum parenting books in private around like age 11 or so to better learn what not to do. Tbh I just wanted to be treated normally and not have to receive any additional help, but in hindsight I benefited a lot from the therapy and am lucky my parents noticed the signs, took it seriously, and had the means to pursue help before I was old enough to fully understand what was going on. There was a point in my life where I dealt heavily with feelings of insecurity and feeling “broken,” but in recent years I’ve come to love and appreciate my weird self a lot more. Heck, I almost take pride in having a secret nerdy side that only a few people know about. I also think times are slowly changing for the better in that people like us have an easier time being understood and socially accepted than how things were years ago. That may just be my subjective experience though; maybe I’ve just learned how to seek out people I can vibe with better than I was able to at a younger age :p

I do pretty well functioning-wise (not sure if there’s a proper term for that) and could probably pass as an introverted NT. I do have some sensory issues though, mostly with the texture/taste of certain foods. I like a big enough variety of foods that it’s not really noticeable and I can usually find something I like on any menu but like, keep green beans and any and all kinds of salad dressing (among other things) aWAY FROM ME lol. I’m also prone to stress in uncomfortable situations, especially if I feel like my privacy is being invaded, but know myself well enough to know when I need to get away to avoid a meltdown (which for me looks like shutting down, feeling claustrophobic, and not wanting to talk to anyone for a while till I’ve cooled down). Socially I do alright, but if I’m not familiar with a person or group I tend to do more listening than talking until I feel like I have a good read on them. I worry this can make me come off as cold/reserved but tbh it’s partially social anxiety, but partially also because I often find other people’s lives and experiences way more interesting to chat about than my own anyway lol. People tend to like me once they take the time to get to know me though, and I find a lot of enjoyment in helping and supporting the people I care about. Physical touch is cool as long as I’m comfortable enough with the person giving it but I can be iffy with touchy strangers.

The only place I really struggle in a super life-inhibiting way is spatial awareness, eg using too much or too little force to do an action, not judging distances well, or just not being super aware of my body in general so I’m clumsy and run into stuff sometimes x.x For this reason and the challenges associated with it, I’ve struggled a lot with learning to drive even as an adult. I’m hoping to get my license within the next year or so but it’s slow going which has made getting jobs difficult before. I’ve thankfully found work that is accessible to me for now with an on-campus job that should last me the rest of the time I’m in college, but I will definitely need a car in the future for the career field I want.

My special interests change throughout the years but some long-standing ones are Pokémon/Nintendo in general, certain rock/punk bands I’m a huge fan of, and urban exploration of abandoned places (mostly malls and amusement parks). I don’t often do the latter myself but love reading up on it and watching YouTube channels like Dan Bell’s dead mall series. I’m also kinda prone to hyperfixating on stuff, usually a specific piece of media (music albums, video games, anime series, etc). This can last for weeks or even a couple months at a time.

@OwU please tell me more about the euarchontoglires that stuff is my jam

I’m tired and will make a full post tomorrow

I was almost diagnosed with Autism. It was around middle school, when my anger depression had started, and I had/have a lot of the indicators. I was eventually diagnosed with Schizotypal Personality Disorder, which has a few things in common with autism.

I could go on a list, but it would be super long. But let me just say I have huge respect for people with autism. Having a mental thing is super had to deal with. (Like I have to deal with schizo-type things, which aren't fun at all.) And all who don't use it as a crutch, I salute you.

:>

i don't really like using the functioning labels for. a lot of reasons but yeah im autistic! never been Professionally Diagnosed but it's been pretty obvious since i was a toddler. i ALSO have adhd, which has a lot of overlap, but i do have symptoms of both that don't fit the other!

my personal experience has been pretty good, honestly. i was kind of the Weird Kid in school but beyond grade 3 or 4 i never really had any problems because of it. since i was never professionally diagnosed it was never an issue with other people knowing and treating me badly because of it, which is pretty lucky since i know it's something a lot of people go through

my symptoms are pretty low-level but wide range. i have trouble in irl social settings, and a lot of the time will just not talk around people i don't know or feel comfortable around (i've taken notice before of the fact that i sometimes just don't talk for hours, even if others are around). i also have trouble with reading tone and emotions in some situations. i have a lot of sensory issues too, and actually have misophonia/misokinesia as a result of my autism. this basically means certain sounds or things i see (often repetitive sounds/movements) will cause me mental pain. there are a lot of textures i can't deal with as well

i have hyperfixations and special interests too, which is my favourite part of being autistic! my special interests have generally lasted several years/up to a decade (flight rising is my current special interest!). i hyperfixate a lot and can get lost in activities for hours

i stim a lot too! personally i think it's a pretty neat thing, it makes me feel good and i've not had too many negative experiences with other people being bad about it. i like to hold my hands in the "raptor hands" position and shake them side to side, and i'll shake my head side to side and up

i do very much like being autistic- while there are downsides, it's a big part of who i am and how i view the world and i'd never want to get rid of it. i only wish it wasn't seen as an inherently negative thing to have by the majority of society, because the autistic people i know are some of the most unique, interesting, and talented people i know and have so much to offer. autistic people's lives could be improved so much if people stopped viewing it as an awful heartbreaking disease and tried to help and accommodate us and accept it as just another way to be