CosmicFalcon » Hibernal Den » Sehnsucht

Sehnsucht

(#29719686)

"After everything, I'm left to ask myself why I even tried."

Familiar

Crowned Bonepriest

Energy: 50/50

Personal Style

Apparel

Skin

Scene

Physical Attributes

Battle Stats

Measurements

Length

8.3 m

Wingspan

8.93 m

Weight

961.13 kg

Genetics

Cream
Piebald

Black
Paint

Charcoal
Thylacine

Hatchday

Dec 31, 2016
(7 years)

Breed

Adult
Coatl

Eye Type

Plague
Common

Level 1 Coatl

EXP: 0 / 245

STR

AGI

DEF

QCK

INT

VIT

MND

Lineage

Parents

Kalma
Tiera

Offspring

none

Biography

Sehnsucht
German in origin, meaning to have a longing for something non materialistic, but to not know what you're longing for.

|| Blooming Afflicted || Night Scout ||
"What's so civil about war, anyway?" - Axl Rose

Generally pretty patient - Trait - Trait

Personality

______Sehn used to be rather energetic and curious. Eager to horse around and do as he pleases rather than being made responsible for something. He's more than a little snarky with sass and an attitude to match, but no one ever expected him to be the Casanova that he is. He's good at the whole 'love' thing and can be a real flirt, but he can have more than a mean streak when he wants to. Despite being a dragon who usually cares for and protects others. The perfect dad figure for the most part. Sehnsucht can kick grass when he really needs to.

______However, just like other Afflicted coatls the Nosos virus causes him his fair share of problems. From dizzy spells to trouble standing at all and narcolepsy, it's irritating more than anything else and is actually quite healthy despite being a plague born afflicted. Thought after Wisteria left, he is now severally depressed and unable to get over his failure and guilt. Veering hard into self hate and nihilism, especially when wasted.

______He's more than happy to lay around and sleep, than actually do chores. He used to love to help Cassiopeia with the hatchlings or even with hatching the eggs. It's really odd to some and Sehn does question his sexuality almost all the time, Kraven in certainly no help when it comes to that. His cousin flirts with him often and sometimes goes a bit too far, but he can't exactly say that he entirely hates it.

He's currently taken up jobs as a merc or temporary bodyguard.

However, this happy personality all but disappeared when the love of his life left him. Now he relies more on his snarky remarks. He's a little less than deplorable, taking up the habit of drinking, smoking like a train and bedding anyone who falls for his stupid flattery. Not meaning a single word of any of it and only trying to ease the pain of a broken heart. Turning into more of a recluse, to mope on his own.

Being more tolerant of his cousin than ever before cause he doesn't give a flying duck about much anymore, as Krave is just another tool. Much less patient and more irritable with basically everyone, wanting nothing more to live by an don his own schedule. Screw everyone else. Rowdiness and excess energy being taken out in fight club and coming home busted and more lethargic then when he left most days.

A B O U T

Nickname:Sehn, Zen.
Age: Young Adult (23 - 24)
Height: 6'0"- 6'2"
Gender: Male
Pronouns: He/Him
Sexuality: Heterosexual (possibly bisexual)

Residence: Clan of Fallen Stars
Birthplace:

Likes: Flirting, Alcohol, Cigarettes, Weed, Forgetting his problems.

Dislikes: Being ordered around, Kraven at times, What his life has become.

Hobbies: Reading and doodling occasionally, Getting sucked into a variety of schemes.[nextcol]
Ex-Mate: Wisteria - He can't bring himself himself stop loving her.
Relatives:
Kalma - Father
Tiera - Mother
Sober - Brother
Topac - Uncle
Malala - Aunt
Kraven - Cousin

Friends:
Enemies:
Reputation: Good

Align: Chaotic Good
Virtue:He has a good head on his shoulders and knows what he's doing most the time.
Vice:Sehn is stubborn, lazy and often has to be bribed if you want him to do something.

F A M I L I A R S

Legs

Legs is a big bug that loves to cuddle. He is very loving and is often curled around the lair's nest, protecting them. He helps hunt small pests in or out of the area and isn't against making a meal of any dragon that crosses his clan.

╭━━━━━━━━━━━━━╮

Playlist

So Far Away

Always

Say it Ain't So

You're Somebody Else

Voice -

(Ray Chase)
╰━━━━━━━━━━━━━╯

Backstory

Sehn was born one of the healthiest out of his immediate siblings and this both thrilled and amazed his parents. Sehn was a tough kid and would thrill his siblings by doing small things easily that they had trouble with, such as caring a particularly large fish and such. Kalma and Tiera knew that Sehn was a good hearted kid, he was always trying to help and watching over others. Especially his cousin, Kraven.

Kraven and his siblings were born close to Sehn and his. However, Kraven was born the exact opposite of his cousin. Small, pale, and weak. Despite this, Sehn and others almost always invited the virulent coatl to play. They tried to be careful as to not trigger a coughing fit, however it got to the point where the simplest things would throw Kraven into a coughing spell.

Other oddities would appear, missing feathers. Bandages all over and the small, ill child acted as if someone had been hurting him. There was an aversion from Kraven toward his brother Mark, it’s obvious now what was going on. But back then, Sehn didn’t really understand. He couldn’t decode the unspoken, forced silence Mark had Kraven under. Kraven would just say it was because of his illness.

It’s something that’s bothered Sehn ever since, Kraven just won’t tell him what happened.

Sehn tried to tell his parents, but to little avail. All they could see were symptoms of the Nosos Virus. Everyone tried to ease the virulent coat's issues. Sehnsucht was by far the most adamant that Kraven would get better or could get better. He became a crutch for ill relative, providing him motivation to not want to die. Needless to say parents of both children were bewildered by the extent of which Sehnsucht could get others to exert themselves. Just because he believed in them so much so that he wasn't willing to acknowledge death as acceptable option for anyone.

After running possibilities through his head, the healthier young boy practically dragged his small, frail cousin from their home. The lack of goodbye scarring Kraven in the long run, abruptly leaving the only safe place he knew. Would be a stressor that he’d never get over and ultimately a factor that broke him.

Sehn didn’t really think about the possible repercussions, he just knew he had to get Kraven out of the disease infested place they called home before it killed them. He was desperate. Pulling all nighters multiple times to make sure they covered as much ground as possible or to make sure Kraven made it through the night.

It was a grueling process for the both of them, both being so young at the time. Sehn's resolve nearly broke a couple times when Kraven seemed near dead in his arms. How Kraven survived at all was even beyond all reasoning, to this day even. Contributing it to the cleaner environment away from the plaguelands. Observing life slowly returning to his slightly younger relative, once again having urge to eat and drink. Albeit sparingly, but it was a sign, a sign that Sehnsucht was right.

One's symptoms would get better if they left the plaguelands.

It took a few more days before the two found a seemingly safe place to crash, Kraven now walking on his own feet. Sehn had observed a cavern entrance for a while before attempting to enter themselves. Much to their surprise no one really minded when they just walked in. There were a few curious dragons, most didn't really care or notice and a few actually genuinely cared about their situation.

Not even other afflicted coatls living there at the time cared too much and don’t really care to this day. It was still a welcome change from the diseased air and pulsating flesh of their original home.Both still young. Not realizing Kraven’s strange behavior and personality shift until weeks after their initial welcome. It seems their journey had put too much stress on the ailing child, breaking his mind in place of his mortality. Kraven was like a completely different person, no longer the sweet, loving and innocent little cousin Sehn knew so well.

Instead he had become violent and aggressive, spiralling into psychotic episodes when pushed too far or set off by extreme terror that Sehn barley grasped the reasoning for. Sehn blames himself for the change, to this day. Still unsure whether his initial decision was the right one. Whether it would’ve been better to let his cousin die the innocent, suffering child he was. Or postpone his death, yet let him live with a fractured mind and body. Sehn’s only reassurance is in the rare times he’s seen Kraven content.

Yet Sehnsucht defended his cousin adamantly, both verbally and physically. As quite a few individuals have presented themselves as a threat to the young man’s life. No one could fathom why Sehn would protect Kraven, the boy knew full well his cousin was a threat. That didn’t matter to Sehn though, he was damn sure everything would get better and for them both. They did.

WhenSehn was around 20, the familiar of a young coatl lead him to its owner, unconscious amongst some brush. Sehn’s heart did backflips long before his brain registered the reason for it. Barely a week after she had woken up was it painfully obvious that Sehnsucht was infatuated with her. As deeply as love could tether iself in one’s soul. Some say true love doesn’t exist, but of those coatls could prove otherwise.

There was however, one person that wasn’t thrilled by this development in the slightest. Unmeasurable terror bled into Kraven’s mind, near possessing him. The idea of being replaced and forgotten. Abandoned and left to suffer alone by the only person who still cared about him was unbearable. Jealousy, anxiety and terror sent Kraven into a fever pitched violent state. Bent on getting Wisteria out of the picture, scaring both Sehn and his love.

Until Sehnsucht realized why his cousin had become so distraught. Reassuring him constantly that there was no way Sehn could even dream of forgetting him. Their entire lives had been spent alongside each other. Sehn had kept a eye on his runty cousin since birth pretty much and he didn’t plan on letting that change. No matter how frantic Kraven became his cousin would always be there, yet there is no match for the power of one’s brain. Even one as broken as Kraven’s.

Still his terror haunted him, ravenously and Kraven responded on par with it. Whether his threats toward Wisteria were wholehearted, no one can be sure. Thought it is very much in truth, that Whisty watched him hesitate on many occasions before Sehn or someone else stepped in. She herself told Kraven multiple times that she would never taken Sehnsucht from him. That she wouldn’t even think of such a thing, she knew very well how much Sehn meant to his virulent cousin. It was in his eyes, just as much as his fear was.

Despite the terror and stress the virulent bloomer caused Wisteria, Sehnsucht told her. Reassured her that it would be okay, everything would be okay. Kraven wasn’t always like this, but it’s extremely hard to make someone believe something they themselves haven’t seen with their own eyes. It wasn’t just his future wife he had to convince, but also his clan mates, total strangers, everyone who didn’t know the truth. It was a one sided battle in every sense, one that would kill anyone inside after a while. However, no matter how many were against Sehn and Kraven, Sehn wasn’t wrong.

Kraven did get better, it was painfully slow at first and damn near unnoticeable. Sehn noticed though, as he had known the pain in the *** since birth. He knew Kraven like no one else did and between his own constant reassuring and Wisteria showing she did indeed care for them both regardless. Krave’s demon’s finally started to crack, his discontent became more vocal. Rather than physical

Any real stability happened after medication was introduced and a little more time passed. Kraven was still aggressive and scrappy, but it was a noticeable improvement. Too bad it was only noticeable after Wisteria left. Leaving without saying a word to anyone, only leaving a note. A note that Sehnsucht swore was written so elegantly it could only have been done by an angel and he was right. An angel did write it, his angel.

Dread and terror filled the young man’s being instantly, scouring every corner of the cavern, slamming open every door. Becoming more and more frantic, desperate to prove what the note said wasn’t true. Eventually slamming open the door to his shared room, Kraven reclined in their bed. His scarlet eyes fluorescent against the dark of the room that the hallway light did not touch.

He seemed unfazed by the sudden noise, not even the slightest bit startled, just tired. Looking over casually as if nothing was wrong. Unbridled anger flowed in Sehn’s red eyes, his body tense in an attempt to contain himself. His own nails cutting into the palms of his hands due to how tightly he had been squeezing them.

“What did you do.” it was a snarl, a fathomless, unforgiving sound from somewhere in Sehn’s chest. Commanding an answer.

“Nothing, I just woke up…” Kraven replied, confused about what could have Sehn so infuriated. Everything was alright yesterday, for the most part. He hadn’t even been around to bug anyone until late that evening.

“Wisteria left, just like you wanted.” Sehn’s words came out between tightly gritted teeth. Hot tears welling up in his eyes, becoming even more irritated at the dumbfounded look on his cousin’s face. Kraven didn’t believe him. The patchwork ravenette could hear his own blood pumping and he lunged at his relative. Grabbing Kraven by the collar, strangling the fabric like he wanted to strangle Kraven’s neck.

In that moment, Sehnsucht wanted to tell Kraven how he wished he had let him die. It would’ve saved them both all the trouble, but he couldn’t. In fact that exact thought is what pushed Sehn’s tears to cascade down his face. The ravennette released his grip on Kraven’s shirt collar and made a brisk exit. He didn’t come back for a few days after that and when he finally did he was plastered and in bed with a few people during that time.

Consumed by guilt over letting things deteriorate to such a degree. For putting Wisteria in the line of fire for so long, he should've known better. He’s just as much to blame for the situation as Kraven as it was clear from the start. Sehn is the sole reason Wisteria subjugated herself to such a living hell, he should’ve never made her go through any of it. Young and dumb, caused yet another casualty.

Ultimately unable to live with his mistakes and the pain of losing those he loves. Kraven included. Turning to alcohol, cigarettes, mary jane and getting laid for self medication. Becoming a real inconsiderate jerk, falling apart and losing everything he’s build up.

He’s currently a husk of his former self, truly unrecognizable. this can’t be the man so driven to find an answer to their affliction. Once so adamant that death wasn’t the answer, to now be craving death himself. Sehn’s lost faith in everyone including himself, there’s no drive in him. Only to live like an animal until he ultimately bites the bullet. Deteriorating his once decent health, since his change of lifestyle. He’s now to coughing up blood and vomiting. It scares Kraven and he’s now desperately playing the same part that Sehsucht once played for him.

“Why bother, you already ruined my life just to make yourself happy. Just enjoy it.” Sehn remarked one evening, as he laid on his back in their bed. Staring blankly up at the ceiling, not missing a beat. Sehn heard his cousin whimper, as if he had been kicked in the ribs. It felt good. Kraven didn’t need the reminder. They were falling apart, Kraven didn’t even like being around his cousin anymore, Sehn noticed how he was being avoided and scoffed in somber, ironic amusement.

‘Now that you have me all to yourself, you want nothing to do with me.” Sehn grumbled further, feeling daggers in Kraven’s gaze. He was an object now to Sehn, a tool, just like the people he slept with and the alcohol. A sources of even more tears then he was worth presently.

“I’m not gonna enjoy watching you die. Death, for people like us. Isn’t something we get to enjoy. But out out of us both, you’ll be the one who gets a second chance.” Kraven states, voice not betraying his frustration as he left. The patchwork ravennette scoffed, seeing no point in trying anymore. Rolling onto his side, irritated that he was gonna have to play catch up.

^mate

^{best friend}

^apprentice

Quote:

"Wow, Dad's got the emo fringe going on." - Roommate, 2/5/2018.

Art by Osmodeus

Quote:

Sehn? is a hunk, he gets to have a title but kraven is a ******* twink." - Fey

12/20/18

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Exalting Sehnsucht to the service of the Plaguebringer will remove them from your lair forever. They will leave behind a small sum of riches that they have accumulated. This action is irreversible.

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