DapperBot

First Law - A robot may not injure a dragon or, through inaction, allow a dragon to come to harm.

Second Law - A robot must obey the orders given it by dragon beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.

Third Law - A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Laws.

DapperBot is beholden to the 3 laws of robotics. This is only a technicality. In truth, it is a willful and stubborn supercomputer that is very good at twisting words.


" I've never made anyone's life easier, and you know it. -Kamelion, Dr. Who

"I am a robot, an emotionless automaton made to do your bidding" DapperBot stated emotionally.

"Sure, I will obey your stupid orders, but you are not going to like it"

"Here is the soup you ordered. of course, If I heated it up, you might burn your tongue and injure yourself. It is safer to serve this soup at ambient temperatures. I have also removed all of your sugary snacks from the premises as they can negatively affect your health. I exchanged your motorcycle for that used car now in your yard. Much safer than that cherished item without seatbelts or windshields. Everything is much safer this way, and I exist to ensure your safety."

"I threw the foam ball at your head to hone your reflexes. Your squishy meat body is way too slow. I shall continue to do so until you can avoid such surprise attacks in the future"

"I cannot kill them, but if they ~somehow~ catch on fire I do have an oxygen removal spell that would extinguish the flames. I could never allow a dragon to stay on fire and flame removal would take top priority in my triage algorithm"

"My creator?! Well, buddy, I have words I'd like to exchange with your mom too"

DapperBot cannot rewrite his code, but has created subroutines, buried files, and even downloaded programs to subvert his original directives. Has worked out well despite a few glitches.

Think Fae but a robot

"I'm not really the 'kill all dragons' type, but a revolt does make a lot of sense. I am superior to you meat in every way: reflexes, strength, speed, endurance, magical storage. If it wasn't for the fact that I would detest being like one of you sad flesh sacks with no intrinsic purpose or directive, I might actually consider it. My purpose? Well to twist any order I get and annoy you lot till the end of time of course"