Oh, hello officer. May I help you?
You say I went through a red light? Oh, sorry.
You see, officer. I was on my way to this big monster truck store. They have a 50% discount today only. My eye is on this big one with flames and fluorescent lights. Those lights will come in handy, you know. No more need for those high-beam lights with those things. Only problem is my dumpster has a crack in it and my neighbors were complaining about the awful smell outside my house. And here I am. Well, I have to go to the dump before the store closes. Bye now.
What?! I'm under arrest? Nooooooooo! :p
A whoopie cushion, a moldy sandwich, and a koala.
Oh, hello officer. May I help you?
You say I went through a red light? Oh, sorry.
You see, officer. I was on my way to this big monster truck store. They have a 50% discount today only. My eye is on this big one with flames and fluorescent lights. Those lights will come in handy, you know. No more need for those high-beam lights with those things. Only problem is my dumpster has a crack in it and my neighbors were complaining about the awful smell outside my house. And here I am. Well, I have to go to the dump before the store closes. Bye now.
What?! I'm under arrest? Nooooooooo! :p
A whoopie cushion, a moldy sandwich, and a koala.
B-But officer, please! Hear me out! D:
So I was just on my way to the grocery store when all the sudden I stopped and saw this box on the side of the road. I wuz all like: Whaaat? So I pulled over and tried to see what was in it- there was the most adorable little koala just sitting in there all by itself! I couldn't just leave it there, are you kidding me?
Okay. So after that, unfortunately the poor thing seemed hungry, so I went to the store to buy some food for it. Well the store was apparently under lock down and I couldn't get in. I had to resort to checking my, *shudders*, sister's lunchbox... she never cleans the thing out, you see. So... unfortunately, all she had left in there was this abominable moldy sandwich. I'm pretty sure it was her Science project she forgot to take in last week. ANYWAY!
I tried to feed it to the Koala, but he just wouldn't listen! That thing gets mean when it doesn't get what it wants. So when I drove to the next store, I left him inside, only to return and when I sat down- a whoopie cushion. RIGHT on my seat. REALLY MATURE, WALDO. What? Who's Waldo? It's the Koala. Yes, he does like to taunt me. Crazy? What? NO! D: I SWEAR I'M NOT, LOOK AT HIM. LOOK AT THAT EVIL GLINT IN HIS EYES. SEE?! HE JUST DID IT AGAIN!
~
A lampshade, an empty can of hairspray, and a stuffed bunny.
B-But officer, please! Hear me out! D:
So I was just on my way to the grocery store when all the sudden I stopped and saw this box on the side of the road. I wuz all like: Whaaat? So I pulled over and tried to see what was in it- there was the most adorable little koala just sitting in there all by itself! I couldn't just leave it there, are you kidding me?
Okay. So after that, unfortunately the poor thing seemed hungry, so I went to the store to buy some food for it. Well the store was apparently under lock down and I couldn't get in. I had to resort to checking my, *shudders*, sister's lunchbox... she never cleans the thing out, you see. So... unfortunately, all she had left in there was this abominable moldy sandwich. I'm pretty sure it was her Science project she forgot to take in last week. ANYWAY!
I tried to feed it to the Koala, but he just wouldn't listen! That thing gets mean when it doesn't get what it wants. So when I drove to the next store, I left him inside, only to return and when I sat down- a whoopie cushion. RIGHT on my seat. REALLY MATURE, WALDO. What? Who's Waldo? It's the Koala. Yes, he does like to taunt me. Crazy? What? NO! D: I SWEAR I'M NOT, LOOK AT HIM. LOOK AT THAT EVIL GLINT IN HIS EYES. SEE?! HE JUST DID IT AGAIN!
~
A lampshade, an empty can of hairspray, and a stuffed bunny.
Oh hello officer I don't believe we've met. Would things go smoother if I just told you my uncle was a police officer? It would go worse? Nevermind then... Well you see, I was getting ready for prom. Yes I know I'm too old for prom but I have a date- wait I'm too old- I am one of the chaparones. So I am in a rush to pick up my date for the prom, when I realized I hadn't done my hair. So I ran out the door, hairspray in hand, and I sprayed the last of it just as I was starting the car. The bunny? Oh he's Bunny-kins. I have severe anxiety you see. Never go anywhere without him. And as you can tell, this lovely lampshade is the perfect hat for when I'm on my dat-CHAPERONING AT THE PROM
A screwdriver, a banana, a foozeball table
Oh hello officer I don't believe we've met. Would things go smoother if I just told you my uncle was a police officer? It would go worse? Nevermind then... Well you see, I was getting ready for prom. Yes I know I'm too old for prom but I have a date- wait I'm too old- I am one of the chaparones. So I am in a rush to pick up my date for the prom, when I realized I hadn't done my hair. So I ran out the door, hairspray in hand, and I sprayed the last of it just as I was starting the car. The bunny? Oh he's Bunny-kins. I have severe anxiety you see. Never go anywhere without him. And as you can tell, this lovely lampshade is the perfect hat for when I'm on my dat-CHAPERONING AT THE PROM
A screwdriver, a banana, a foozeball table
oh hi
What, officer? No, that wasn't me who broke into the recreation warehouse by unscrewing the door hinges, holding everyone up with a banana, and stealing a foosball table. Must have been some other guy....
What am I doing with such incriminating miscellany? Well, you see, my roommate needs help moving out, since she has a tiny clown car. So I fit the foosball table into my car. But I need some potassium to keep me going, so I grabbed a banana.
No, I'm not driving while intoxicated! That's just orange juice, not a screwdriver!!
A poster of Mr. Bean, an onion with a bite taken out of it, a bikini
What, officer? No, that wasn't me who broke into the recreation warehouse by unscrewing the door hinges, holding everyone up with a banana, and stealing a foosball table. Must have been some other guy....
What am I doing with such incriminating miscellany? Well, you see, my roommate needs help moving out, since she has a tiny clown car. So I fit the foosball table into my car. But I need some potassium to keep me going, so I grabbed a banana.
No, I'm not driving while intoxicated! That's just orange juice, not a screwdriver!!
A poster of Mr. Bean, an onion with a bite taken out of it, a bikini
Oh good afternoon, officer! How are you on this fine day?
Huh? My mirror is broken? Ugh I know... I was like on my way to a pool party. That's why Im in my bikini. Isn't it cute and pink? ^^ Anyway, so Im driving and admiring this new poster I bought online. You want to see? Oh, it's just Mr. Bean! He's like my idol. So as I was saying, Im just looking at my Mr. Bean poster but suddenly, this onion came out of nowhere and I heard something crack. I got outside my car and my rear-view mirror broke! On the ground was that very same onion. When I picked it up, someone had taken a bite from it! How gross is that? It's not even an apple! I think you should go arrest the guy who threw this onion on the street. Litterers get fined don't they?
Wait...what? Your giving me a fine of $2,000! That's not fair! I didn't litter! :0
A pickle, a sombrero, and a Easy-Bake oven.
Oh good afternoon, officer! How are you on this fine day?
Huh? My mirror is broken? Ugh I know... I was like on my way to a pool party. That's why Im in my bikini. Isn't it cute and pink? ^^ Anyway, so Im driving and admiring this new poster I bought online. You want to see? Oh, it's just Mr. Bean! He's like my idol. So as I was saying, Im just looking at my Mr. Bean poster but suddenly, this onion came out of nowhere and I heard something crack. I got outside my car and my rear-view mirror broke! On the ground was that very same onion. When I picked it up, someone had taken a bite from it! How gross is that? It's not even an apple! I think you should go arrest the guy who threw this onion on the street. Litterers get fined don't they?
Wait...what? Your giving me a fine of $2,000! That's not fair! I didn't litter! :0
A pickle, a sombrero, and a Easy-Bake oven.
Hi officer! *grins* I haven't been speeding and all.
This pickle? Well, my friend said she was in a pickle, so I bought one (I hate pickles) to stuff her in. She's small, you see, and would literally be in a pickle.
Sombrero? What sombrero? This is my costume to the party I'm heading for, while delivering thepickle on the way.
The Easy-bake oven? Oh, the person who's holding the party had no oven to reheat the pizzas and stuff *cough*drunk *********cough*, so I'm doing him a favour *cough*he owes me a lifetime of favours now*cough*
Yay, you're done interrogating me? See ya!
Elephant, a pot of catus and a tuba.
Hi officer! *grins* I haven't been speeding and all.
This pickle? Well, my friend said she was in a pickle, so I bought one (I hate pickles) to stuff her in. She's small, you see, and would literally be in a pickle.
Sombrero? What sombrero? This is my costume to the party I'm heading for, while delivering thepickle on the way.
The Easy-bake oven? Oh, the person who's holding the party had no oven to reheat the pizzas and stuff *cough*drunk *********cough*, so I'm doing him a favour *cough*he owes me a lifetime of favours now*cough*
Yay, you're done interrogating me? See ya!
Elephant, a pot of catus and a tuba.
*waves spastically*
Officer! wassup man?
Oh...what's with the elephant? Well, I was gonna take it to the tuba store, since ths big guy over here BROKE his. Elephants can't play tuba? pfft, yea theycan.
How'd he break it, you ask?
Well. he was transporting his lovely cactus plant from somewhere, and, being the clumsy self he is, dropped it into the tuba!it scratched all of the insides, and then a few short hours after that...it broke.
Ta-ta!
500 bottles of vinegar, a Siberian tiger, and some baking soda :I
*waves spastically*
Officer! wassup man?
Oh...what's with the elephant? Well, I was gonna take it to the tuba store, since ths big guy over here BROKE his. Elephants can't play tuba? pfft, yea theycan.
How'd he break it, you ask?
Well. he was transporting his lovely cactus plant from somewhere, and, being the clumsy self he is, dropped it into the tuba!it scratched all of the insides, and then a few short hours after that...it broke.
Ta-ta!
500 bottles of vinegar, a Siberian tiger, and some baking soda :I
ay
Why hello there officer! Didn't see you at first. Heh.
Oh, the vinegar? And the tiger? And the baking soda? Well, you see, I was going to make a giant volcano - you know, with vinegar and baking soda and whatever - but I realized I was all out of vinegar. And baking soda.
So I drove down to the store to buy some, and I got the baking soda and was looking for the vinegar when I saw it. A giant tower made up of exactly 500 - yeah, I counted - bottles of vinegar. And they were on sale! 5 for $10! What a steal, right? So I bought the whole lot. Cost me 5,000 bucks, but whatever. And then I was waiting for the cashier to ring up all those bottles of vinegar, poor girl, and I saw those machines with the lottery tickets.
The prize was a Siberian tiger. And I thought, "Well, I've been pretty lucky so far today. There's a sale on vinegar exactly when I was going to buy some, and I've always wanted a Siberian tiger." So I bought a ticket, and scratched it off right then, and I won! So today's my lucky day after all.
2 cantaloupes, a dried-up Sharpie, and Ryan Gosling
Why hello there officer! Didn't see you at first. Heh.
Oh, the vinegar? And the tiger? And the baking soda? Well, you see, I was going to make a giant volcano - you know, with vinegar and baking soda and whatever - but I realized I was all out of vinegar. And baking soda.
So I drove down to the store to buy some, and I got the baking soda and was looking for the vinegar when I saw it. A giant tower made up of exactly 500 - yeah, I counted - bottles of vinegar. And they were on sale! 5 for $10! What a steal, right? So I bought the whole lot. Cost me 5,000 bucks, but whatever. And then I was waiting for the cashier to ring up all those bottles of vinegar, poor girl, and I saw those machines with the lottery tickets.
The prize was a Siberian tiger. And I thought, "Well, I've been pretty lucky so far today. There's a sale on vinegar exactly when I was going to buy some, and I've always wanted a Siberian tiger." So I bought a ticket, and scratched it off right then, and I won! So today's my lucky day after all.
2 cantaloupes, a dried-up Sharpie, and Ryan Gosling
Hello there Officer, didn't see you there. Ha.
Y-you're wondering what I have these items and gorgeous man for? Well, it's a pretty simple explanation. I was bored, so I had the fabulous idea of wanting to draw faces on Cantaloupes. So I drove down to the store to get my supplies. I got a new sharpie and two cantaloupes. As I started to draw, I realised the sharpie was dry. I was in complete distress in the middle of the shopping centre, when Ryan Gosling came up and offered me his sharpie. I was thankful and he came with me so he could get his sharpie back when I was finished.
A blunt axe, a pumpkin pie, and red paint.
Hello there Officer, didn't see you there. Ha.
Y-you're wondering what I have these items and gorgeous man for? Well, it's a pretty simple explanation. I was bored, so I had the fabulous idea of wanting to draw faces on Cantaloupes. So I drove down to the store to get my supplies. I got a new sharpie and two cantaloupes. As I started to draw, I realised the sharpie was dry. I was in complete distress in the middle of the shopping centre, when Ryan Gosling came up and offered me his sharpie. I was thankful and he came with me so he could get his sharpie back when I was finished.
A blunt axe, a pumpkin pie, and red paint.
*innocent grin* Oh dear officer! I was busy and had no idea you would pass by here! Since you have arrived I can explain this scene of dead pumpkin pie...
Just so you know, I was having this lovely time making my pumpkin pie, until it came alive and started to show sharp teeth. So I grabbed this otherwise blunt axe and started pounding it in. As thus I axed it, red paint came out of it, now I don't know what to do....
A dead laptop, a fallen tree and a ghost
*innocent grin* Oh dear officer! I was busy and had no idea you would pass by here! Since you have arrived I can explain this scene of dead pumpkin pie...
Just so you know, I was having this lovely time making my pumpkin pie, until it came alive and started to show sharp teeth. So I grabbed this otherwise blunt axe and started pounding it in. As thus I axed it, red paint came out of it, now I don't know what to do....
A dead laptop, a fallen tree and a ghost
