Dragon Share

5296

November 16, 2020 16:48:15

@Reilata
I will begin your review this evening when I get home from work! I generally only take a day or two, but I will let you know if it's going to be any longer than that.

@WillaTheWitch

That's fine, I'm in no particular rush.
Since it's becoming busy season, I might take a bit to respond myself.

Reilata

0

236

941

5189

November 16, 2020 16:51:20

@WillaTheWitch

That's fine, I'm in no particular rush.
Since it's becoming busy season, I might take a bit to respond myself.

@Reilata

(That'll be only 50 kt. Your lair wasn't nearly as dense as I thought it would be!)

Overall Impressions

At first glance, your lair is very aesthetically pleasing, and I appreciate how you’ve decided to organize your dragons, the location of each tab, and the brief descriptions. I like when lairs are neat and tidy, and the location tags help me better understand the layout of the territory and the relationships. I also love how much dedication and love your put into each dragon—the art, the lore concepts, and the outfits. I don’t see too many folks who love non gens ones this way, and it warms my heart. Your Heartless tabs confuse me, and I wasn’t necessarily able to piece together a cohesive though concerning them or their lore, so I won’t be making any other comment than I am impressed by your dedication to this cause!

Your lore is in desperate need of reorganizing, which you know of course. It is also very extensive, so I think you might benefit from creating a lore thread, if you have the ambition to complete your lore, because it might serve as a great way to get your ideas organized and in chronological order. I am sorry that I am not able to focus on more specifics of your lore. I was able to piece together what has happened, especially concerning Emberflare, but I think the lack of cohesion and consistency made it difficult for me to follow it through in any meaningful capacity.

I love how you include breed changes in your lore, previous mates, and more little details like that. So many people overlook this, and I think these small details can add a lot of richness to a lair, as well as enough fantasy-realism to balance out your dragons and make them feel more alive. They’re not static in their lore, like many of my own dragons are.

I have a soft spot for vampires. I always have and always will. They’re the darlings of fantasy and are so extraordinarily flexible that they can be fit into virtually every genre. You have done this well, and I like the lore you have built surrounding Goldfang and Runesong. I was especially interested in Redwing, and her ability to shapeshift between breeds. I would love to see this group have their own tab, and their lore expanded. What’s better than dragons or vampires? Vampire-dragons, obviously! The dynamics here have a lot of potential. Their story lines can be tender and heartfelt, violent and action-packed, or sorrowful and dreary.

Blazestriker is a dragon whose bio I would love to see more fleshed out and completed. A beastclan hunter is an interesting and dynamic profession that I could see being in high demand in Sornieth! Her current lore is sufficiently tragic and captivating and brings into the limelight another huge lore aspect widely ignored—beastclans. I would love to see a story focused on her as the main character. Her interiority would be interesting to explore.

Shoutout to Rakshasa for being surprisingly beautiful! A carnivorous Tundra would be a very frightening Tundra, indeed, and I would like to see how she became a vicious meat eater.

Withstand

5296

November 16, 2020 23:19:24

@Reilata

(That'll be only 50 kt. Your lair wasn't nearly as dense as I thought it would be!)

Overall Impressions

At first glance, your lair is very aesthetically pleasing, and I appreciate how you’ve decided to organize your dragons, the location of each tab, and the brief descriptions. I like when lairs are neat and tidy, and the location tags help me better understand the layout of the territory and the relationships. I also love how much dedication and love your put into each dragon—the art, the lore concepts, and the outfits. I don’t see too many folks who love non gens ones this way, and it warms my heart. Your Heartless tabs confuse me, and I wasn’t necessarily able to piece together a cohesive though concerning them or their lore, so I won’t be making any other comment than I am impressed by your dedication to this cause!

Your lore is in desperate need of reorganizing, which you know of course. It is also very extensive, so I think you might benefit from creating a lore thread, if you have the ambition to complete your lore, because it might serve as a great way to get your ideas organized and in chronological order. I am sorry that I am not able to focus on more specifics of your lore. I was able to piece together what has happened, especially concerning Emberflare, but I think the lack of cohesion and consistency made it difficult for me to follow it through in any meaningful capacity.

I love how you include breed changes in your lore, previous mates, and more little details like that. So many people overlook this, and I think these small details can add a lot of richness to a lair, as well as enough fantasy-realism to balance out your dragons and make them feel more alive. They’re not static in their lore, like many of my own dragons are.

I have a soft spot for vampires. I always have and always will. They’re the darlings of fantasy and are so extraordinarily flexible that they can be fit into virtually every genre. You have done this well, and I like the lore you have built surrounding Goldfang and Runesong. I was especially interested in Redwing, and her ability to shapeshift between breeds. I would love to see this group have their own tab, and their lore expanded. What’s better than dragons or vampires? Vampire-dragons, obviously! The dynamics here have a lot of potential. Their story lines can be tender and heartfelt, violent and action-packed, or sorrowful and dreary.

Blazestriker is a dragon whose bio I would love to see more fleshed out and completed. A beastclan hunter is an interesting and dynamic profession that I could see being in high demand in Sornieth! Her current lore is sufficiently tragic and captivating and brings into the limelight another huge lore aspect widely ignored—beastclans. I would love to see a story focused on her as the main character. Her interiority would be interesting to explore.

Shoutout to Rakshasa for being surprisingly beautiful! A carnivorous Tundra would be a very frightening Tundra, indeed, and I would like to see how she became a vicious meat eater.

Last edited on Nov 16, 2020 23:20:30 by Withstand

Type of review or dragons to be reviewed (Please give me a link to each dragon): full review!
Special concerns/questions: feel free to check the hibden as well as my WIP tab! page 2 of my wayfarers tab is all fodder
Payment type: T

reapyr

351

155

769

1000

November 16, 2020 23:32:47

Type of review or dragons to be reviewed (Please give me a link to each dragon): full review!
Special concerns/questions: feel free to check the hibden as well as my WIP tab! page 2 of my wayfarers tab is all fodder
Payment type: T

^reapyr
——————————
> she/they
> FR +0
> ridgeback enthusiast

@reapyr
It's too late for me to start on your review tonight, so I will hop to it first thing tomorrow.

Withstand

5296

November 16, 2020 23:34:43

@reapyr
It's too late for me to start on your review tonight, so I will hop to it first thing tomorrow.

Type of review or dragons to be reviewed: Full review! :3
Special concerns/questions: My lore isn't written just yet. A few dragons have lore snippets on them. But I like to hear what kinda impression my dragons gave to others - like 'This dragons looks like he has this job' or something like that.
Also ignore the 'Stumble Inn'-tab and the HibDen please :3
Payment type: Treasure or gems, whichever YOU prefer - got both on hand, actually need both so it doesn't matter for me XD

Riesenraddieb

453

75

955

2380

November 17, 2020 01:07:36

Type of review or dragons to be reviewed: Full review! :3
Special concerns/questions: My lore isn't written just yet. A few dragons have lore snippets on them. But I like to hear what kinda impression my dragons gave to others - like 'This dragons looks like he has this job' or something like that.
Also ignore the 'Stumble Inn'-tab and the HibDen please :3
Payment type: Treasure or gems, whichever YOU prefer - got both on hand, actually need both so it doesn't matter for me XD

@WillaTheWitch

Haha, thanks for the rundown. My disorganization is partially because dragons are for myself first, with only partial thought to anyone else looking at them. A bit of the 'well it makes sense to me'. ;;;

While I understand that it could help. I don't think I could handle a lore thread, I find the idea way too intimidating as I can find writing very difficult and having so much space to have to deal with one idea is a big no. ~~adhd doesn't help~~ I also kind of like just having bits of story, where people might be able to fit things together how things are going if they actually want to, rather than an exact written out timeline. Kind of Dark Souls item descriptions method of things.

The whole Heartless mess is pretty much just a KH fandragon tab with a bunch of monsters. (Plus three shady types.) Just another one of the things that is going to go very badly, as I like things teetering on the edge of disaster.

My lair is kind of an experiment in how many potential cataclysms can be shoved into a small space. While not really intending to write about it actually going bad, you can get enough of an idea of how things are going to end up.

Reilata

0

236

941

5189

November 17, 2020 07:20:55

@WillaTheWitch

Haha, thanks for the rundown. My disorganization is partially because dragons are for myself first, with only partial thought to anyone else looking at them. A bit of the 'well it makes sense to me'. ;;;

While I understand that it could help. I don't think I could handle a lore thread, I find the idea way too intimidating as I can find writing very difficult and having so much space to have to deal with one idea is a big no. ~~adhd doesn't help~~ I also kind of like just having bits of story, where people might be able to fit things together how things are going if they actually want to, rather than an exact written out timeline. Kind of Dark Souls item descriptions method of things.

The whole Heartless mess is pretty much just a KH fandragon tab with a bunch of monsters. (Plus three shady types.) Just another one of the things that is going to go very badly, as I like things teetering on the edge of disaster.

My lair is kind of an experiment in how many potential cataclysms can be shoved into a small space. While not really intending to write about it actually going bad, you can get enough of an idea of how things are going to end up.

Type of review or dragons to be reviewed (Please give me a link to each dragon): full lair review!
Special concerns/questions: ive redone my lair a bit since last time :P avoid The Nest, Cadence Camp, Ascent Square, and Stronghold. i don't think i ever found the time to redo much of my lore since then though :(
Payment type: treasure

sharlayan

743

275

1172

4175

November 17, 2020 07:51:59

Type of review or dragons to be reviewed (Please give me a link to each dragon): full lair review!
Special concerns/questions: ive redone my lair a bit since last time :P avoid The Nest, Cadence Camp, Ascent Square, and Stronghold. i don't think i ever found the time to redo much of my lore since then though :(
Payment type: treasure

em/sai | all pronouns | fr+2 | pings ok
wishlist | fandragon project
probably on ffxiv

This is my secret text... Let's keep it between us, ok?
-> HES SO SMALL AAAA

@Reilata
I do have a lore-writing service if you're ever interested! Never forget that the only person whose lore must make happy is you. I've started up several lore threads, too, if you ever need further advice.

@Riesenraddieb @Saiban
Added to the WIP section.

Withstand