Inkblot

I sat in the lobby, nervously tapping my heel. She’d told me that she would be here sometime before noon, and I’d realized probably too late that I should have asked for a more specific time. I was hesitant to send her another message for fear of pestering her. Still, I didn’t have anywhere else to be, and the lobby was a quiet enough environment that I didn’t mind waiting there for too long. Now if she’d asked me to meet her in the dining hall, on the other hand…

Hearing someone call my name, I immediately straightened my posture. It was her. She was coming from upstairs, so she’d probably just come from a lab. That explained the lack of a specific time; labs rarely lasted as long as they were scheduled to.

“H-hey.” I grinned awkwardly. Talking to most people was hard enough, but there was something about her that took the words out of my mouth and scrambled them up. I don’t know whether it was her bright eyes or the fact that she was willing to talk to me even though I was mostly closed off from the world, but whatever the reason, she caused a flutter in my heart and my stomach that somehow made me feel giddy and terrified at the same time.

“I, uh, d-drew you a picture,” I continued, turning away to grab my sketchbook and hoping against hope that my face just happened to be hot and I wasn’t visibly blushing. I never liked showing my emotions, and I didn’t want to risk making things awkward between me and the only friend I’d made here. Handing over the picture, I added, “I d-didn’t know what kind of animals you like, so I just went with a koi fish. I’m sorry.”

“What are you apologizing for? This is so cool!” she gushed, and now I knew I was blushing. I looked down to hide the stupid grin on my face behind my hair. I never had been good at accepting thanks or praise from people I’d worked on artwork for—not online, and definitely not in person—but it always lifted my spirits. Not because I thought I was improving at my artwork (I was always super aware of the flaws) but because I’d made someone happy, even if it was just for a moment.

“Are you a physical contact kind of person?” she suddenly asked.

“I-I’m sorry?”

“Can I give you a hug?”

Instead of answering out loud, I just put my arms out and accepted the hug. I’d always been a hugger, but I’d built tall, dark walls lined with barbed wire and “KEEP OUT” signs around myself for years, and admitting that I was basically a marshmallow kind of broke that tough-girl illusion. I didn’t know how, but she was able to bust right through that wall like the Kool-Aid mascot with just a kind word. The thought warmed me and scared me and left me feeling confused, but it was a good kind of confusion. I think.

She asked if I wanted to join her and her friends for lunch, but the group was already much too full for my comfort, and I didn’t want to intrude on a gathering comprised mostly of people I didn’t know. I declined somewhat reluctantly, already feeling awkward about the entire exchange.

But as I walked back home, I found myself hugging my sketchbook to my chest and bearing a small, shy smile.

Written by Bibbit
Based on a true story.


Art by Bibbit