Bitterness

Having dealt with all the stuff I have, there's a part of me that is so angry and frustrated. It is particularly unsettled by seeing people who have the emotional support of friends or a loving family that I seldom had, sensory triggers like smell and feeling, or being upset or jealous about something I want and can't get. This alter also has all of my toxic trauma responses like lying, hiding my feelings, pushing away loved ones, unnecessary defensiveness, and passive aggressiveness.

While that all seems very unflattering, and it is, this alyer is still a part of me. One that is literally screaming to just be healed and loved. I'm choosing to be the one who loves that part of me when it's feeling like no one loves me at all. By doing so, I've learned to control it, to acknowledge, understand, and respect where these feelings are coming from but to also have alters like Resolve and Fortitude that can make sure these feelings don't just run rampant.

Long story short, self love means the whole self. Self respect means the whole self.