Elan

Hope has filled her soul. Hope leads her heart. But it’s false hope, it is nothing but despair wearing a mask. She is guided by a guide who wants nothing good for her. She follows it though, her every move is guided by this false hope. And she smiles, she encourages, she believes that things will get better. She believes where others have long forgotten how to believe.

You’re not quite sure where this sudden surge of energy comes from. Suddenly, you feel invigorated! You feel hopeful! It’s time to do something you’ve been putting off for ages, it’s time to try something new! With renewed vitality, you walk the streets of the city. Why not try to eat something new today? Why not wear a new hat today? Maybe try a different genre of books! The possibilities are endless!

But as the night falls, and you’ve done all that and more, you suddenly feel empty. You’ve done everything you set out to do, so why do you feel so unfulfilled? Why do you feel so… So incomplete? You feel as if you will never know the answer, and you go to bed feeling sad and alone. The energy might have helped you do new things, but the crash afterwards wasn’t worth it at all.

She despises this existence. She wishes to be freed of it. One way or another, she will break free and become whole again. No matter what it will take. No matter who will die in the process. No matter if she will die in the process. She will fight for it until the end of the universe, and longer if necessary. She will one day see the sun again, she will one day see the seasons change again. Even if it’s just for a moment.

This too will end, whatever the consequences.