Bolster

The fluffiest Pillow ever to have walked on the surface of this planet

Overconfidence, vanity, determination... Those are just a few of the traits that give him his fame as a celebrity. His biggest dream is to one day be the best-known dragon on the globe. He's handsome and fluffy and people are loving it. He's also a bit of a d**chebag.

He has lots of fans all over the world, including @ComfortZone's dragons as well as some of my own.

He takes pride in the songs that he writes... Alright, the songs aren't his, he just edited the lyrics... Ok, the truth is he didn't even do that, he just claims to have.

THE PILLOW EVOLUTION
(originally Do The Evolution by Pearl Jam)

Woo
I'm a furry, I'm so fluffy
I'm the first dragon to be a pillow, yeah
I'm at peace with other dudes
I can kill 'cause in my flight I trust, yeah
It's evolution, baby

I'm in a bed, I'm the cushion
Buying socks every day with cash
On the floor, I'm stuffed
All the aching heads, I'll make 'em well, yeah
It's fuzz behavior, uh huh
It's evolution, baby

Admire me, admire my flight
Admire my fur, that'll make me purr
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
This woman's mine, this gal ain't free
I'll do what I want with her irresponsibly
It's evolution, baby

I'm a bolster, I am Bolster
There's my lair, I sing with my choir:
(Cushionlujah, pillowlujah)

Admire me, admire my clan
Admire my claws, admire my nose
'Cause we know, desire for a nightly sleep
Those ignorant ones got nothin' on me
Nothin', why?
Because it's evolution, baby!

I am ahead, I am advanced
I am the first pillow to make people smile, yeah
I was ugly, but now I'm nice
2019, watch it go to trash
It's evolution, baby
Do the pillow evolution
Come on, come on, come on

THE SLEEPING BOLSTER
(originally The Weeping Song by Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds, edited lyrics by @ComfortZone)

Go son, go down to the water
And see the women sleeping there
Then go up into the mountains
The men, they are sleeping too

Father, why are all the women sleeping?
They are sleeping on a bolster
Then why are all the men there sleeping?
They are sleeping on a bolster too

This is a sleeping bolster
A bolster on which to sleep
Look how well all the men and women sleep!
This is a sleeping bolster
But I won't be sleeping long

Father, why are all the children sleeping?
They are merely dozing, son
O, are they merely dozing, father?
Yes, true sleeping is yet to come

This is a sleeping bolster, a bolster on which to weep
Look how well all the men and women sleep!
This is a sleeping bolster
But I won't be sleeping long

O father tell me, are you sleeping?
Your eyes seem almost closed
O then I'm so sorry, father
I never thought I exhausted you so much

This is a sleeping bolster
A bolster on which to sleep
While the rocks try to wake us
This is a sleeping bolster
But I won't be sleeping long
But I won't be sleeping long
But I won't be sleeping long
But I won't be sleeping long

He even changed the lyrics of Alexander Hamilton to fit his own backstory

BOLSTER THE PILLOW CELEBRITY
(Originally Alexander Hamilton from Hamilton)

How does a bas**rd, orphan son of a none
And a none, dropped in the middle of a forgotten spot on the Internet
By providence, impoverished, in squalor, grow up to be a narcissist and a someone?

The Cushion Club
Founding father without a father
Got a lot farther by working a lot harder, by being a lot fluffier
By being a self-lover, by 14 they placed him in charge of a cushion charter

And every day while pillows were being parceled and carted away
Arranging trades, he struggled and kept his head up
Inside he was longing for someone to be adored by
Didn't have a brother and was ready to be exalted

Then the Lightning Flight came, and devastation reigned
Our man saw his fur grow, growing a nice mane
Put a needle in his paw, connected it to a knot
And he sewed his first pillow, a cure for discomfort

Well the word got around, they said
"This kid's pretty great, man!"
Took up a collection just to send him to a new clan
"Get your reputation, let them know your name
And the world's gonna go insane. So what's your name man?"

Bolster the Pillow Celebrity
My name is Bolster the Pillow Celebrity
And there's a million dragons who still aren't my fans
But just you wait, just you wait

When he was 10, his father split, full of it, debt ridden
2 years later, see Bolster and his mother bed-ridden
Asleep, sitting in their own warmth, the pillows soft
And Bolster woke up but his mom lapsed into a coma

Moved in with a cousin, the cousin committed suicide
Left him with nothing but ruined make-up, hairs all around
A voice saying, "Bolster you really are a cool man"
He got even more awesome and wrote an ode to himself

There woulda been nothin' left to do for someone less alluring
He woulda been poor and insecure without a cent of restitution
Started blogging, making pillows, breaking all records
Trading bolster battle stones and all the things he could afford
Scamming for every pillow he can get his head on
Planning for the future, see him now as he sleeps on
A very stinky bus headed for a new land
In Arcane you can become a star

Just you wait
(In Arcane you can become a star) Just you wait
In Arcane you can become a star
In Arcane (Arcane)
Just you wait!

Bolster the Pillow Celebrity (Bolster the Pillow Celebrity), we're waiting with open wings for you (waiting with open wings for you)
You could never back down, you never learned to respect us
Oh, Bolster the Pillow Celebrity (Bolster the Pillow Celebrity), when Flight Rising sings for you
Will they know what you overcame?
Will they know you rewrote the game?
Pillows will never be same, oh
The bus is in the lair now, see if you can spot him
Another custom progen coming up from the bottom
Flight Rising built up his rep, all dragons loved him

We were fans of his
Me? I slept with him
Me? I followed him
Me? I loved him
And me? I'm the damn fool that doubted him

There's a million dragons who still aren't my fans!
But just you wait
What's your name man?
Bolster the Pillow Celebrity!