Farcaller » Hibernal Den » Afterburn

Afterburn

(#26450236)

Level 1 Wildclaw

Familiar

Apatite Fisher

Energy: 50/50

Personal Style

Apparel

Skin

Scene

Physical Attributes

Battle Stats

Measurements

Length

6.64 m

Wingspan

8.38 m

Weight

604.89 kg

Genetics

Denim
Cherub

Sunshine
Butterfly

Buttercup
Glimmer

Hatchday

Aug 25, 2016
(7 years)

Breed

Adult
Wildclaw

Eye Type

Fire
Common

Level 1 Wildclaw

EXP: 0 / 245

STR

AGI

DEF

QCK

INT

VIT

MND

Lineage

Parents

Fei
Pharah

Offspring

none

Biography

xxxxxxx

"I'm not what history makes me out to be.
I'm not a hero."

» ABOUT
.
Right place, right time. That is Afterburn's story.

A devoted soldier and captain, Afterburn is fairly well-known among the Decepticons. Mentions of his name bring to mind past battles and glorious triumphs— the greatest moments of the war. Mechs comment on his skill and strength, his bravery, his tactical prowess and ability to calmly guide a team to victory even in the most dangerous and hopeless of situations. They have given him medals for deeds he cannot call his own; commendations for prowess he never showed. None of them know.

Everything is a lie. Now Afterburn stands, raised above mechs he once called equals, feeling the weight of all his badges bear down upon him - a burden he can't shake, like the weight of a coffin carried on his shoulders.

Afterburn has faked his way through life, though that wasn't his intent. He is not an inherently dishonest mech. He's just been swept along by others' misinterpretations of his experiences and their ever-growing expectations of him, and he hasn't had the heart to try and explain things properly. He tried, he used to, but no one ever listened. "Don't be so modest," they said. "You're a hero," they said.

Afterburn does not feel like a hero. He feels like a fraud.

To others, he is the ideal Decepticon: talented, dedicated, and loyal to a fault. Lesser soldiers look up to him as a role model but beneath the veneration and praise, Afterburn can hear the bitter whispers of those who know better. The only ones who know the truth are the dead mechs whose glory he unwittingly stole, and it is their ghosts he carries guiltily with him - they give voice to his insecurities and it is their faces he sees in the shadows of his dreams. Afterburn believes he is not worth elevating to such heights, claiming that in reality, he's quite the opposite to the perfect soldier everyone else makes him out to be. He is weak, indecisive, and certainly not qualified to lead anyone.

But with so much to live up to, it's a wonder things haven't come crashing down around him - is it all down to uncanny luck? Perhaps it was in the beginning, but even if his medals are fake, there's no denying that Afterburn is an experienced soldier now. He's worked himself to the bone to keep up with the false image others have created of him, constantly feeling as if he has to be someone he's not, while remaining blind to all the things he has achieved.

Afterburn does not feel like a hero, but that does not mean he hasn't become one.

While Polaris Dawn may be a sentient ship, he still requires a captain— and Afterburn is that captain, though he came to assume the position more out of necessity to ensure everyone's survival than anything else. Besides, he was the only real option - no one else has much experience leading. Steelheart serves in some capacity as his second-in-command, but that's more because he was the one who bound them all together in the first place. Rather than deal with the ship's day to day functions, Steelheart focuses on tracking down people or locations that might aid them in completing their job, or on his weapons. Afterburn works much more closely with Chillwave, his long-time companion and communications officer, who retains his usual job aboard Polaris Dawn on top of acting as the Titan's translator. Though they're a wholly mismatched crew, as dangerous to themselves and each other as they are to potential enemies, Afterburn does his best to take care of all of them.

It's difficult and often thankless work, and it's a cycle that tends to repeat itself as Steelheart drags them into one dangerous venture after another, but Afterburn can't really complain. It keeps him busy, at least, and that's something he is deeply glad for- with the war over, he's been feeling a bit... aimless.

» INTERLUDE: TAKE A GLASS
.
Afterburn has had trouble sleeping lately.

He has dealt with this in the past during periods of particularly high stress - unfortunately, that's a state in which he regularly becomes entrenched. Often, the only way he can even achieve sleep is by forcefully initiating his shutdown protocols, essentially knocking himself offline. It's a familiar struggle - he'll lie on his berth for hours, drifting in and out while the peacefulness of sleep eludes his grasp and slips through his fingertips like oil, and he'll wear his system down until he's left more exhausted than when he first tried to call it a night.

Which is how he finds himself now, late into the Beta shift, lying restless and uncomfortable in his quarters. His HUD is pinging him with mocking warnings: low energy levels - recharge recommended. As if he isn't aware of that. His shutdown protocol attempts to lull him to sleep by dialling down all but his most vital processes, but his spark is racing and his brain won't stop. Afterburn tells himself, mentally, to shut up and let his body get some recharge, but that only results in adding to the noise in his head.

The shutdown program crashes, bringing with it an uncomfortable tingle of static in his helm; the beginnings of a processor ache.

He gives up. Pushing up off the berth, Afterburn leaves his quarters and steps out into Polaris' darkened corridor. They're still stuck with sparse, red-tinged emergency lighting everywhere but the bridge and the medbay, though Chillwave insists he'll have the lights up and running within a day or two. Afterburn can't say he minds too much. He might be used to it, but that doesn't mean he's overly fond of the artificial, too-bright lighting spaceships are typically equipped with.

The walk to the bridge is short - captain's quarters are located close by for necessity, after all. When he arrives, he's almost surprised that Chillwave isn't still there messing with the computers. The seeker has been all but glued to Polaris' navigational console ever since they first brought the ship back online, but he appears to have finally listened to Afterburn's suggestion that he try and get some rest - he won't be any use if he's struggling to stay standing upright. Afterburn laughs despite himself, soft under his breath. If only he could take his own advice.

There's a small energon dispenser here, saving him a longer walk down to the canteen. Filling a mug, Afterburn settles down in the captain's chair and pulls up the latest reports on the computer, sipping his drink as he scans the text. Most of the files are partially corrupted — Polaris' drives must be in quite a state — or half in Primal Vernacular, but from what he can make out, they're diagnostic reports on the Titan's various systems. The nearly illegible state of the reports isn't exactly promising.

Afterburn leans back and rests his helm against the chair, staring up at the rusted ceiling. It's all quiet on the bridge, the only sound a faint and distant rumble from Polaris' engine filtering through from the rear of the ship. They're drifting through deep space and their passage seems inexorably slow— frustrating, but it can't be helped. Afterburn hopes they can find a way to fix the ailing Titan up and get him fully operational again, both for his sake and theirs. Then maybe they'll get somewhere.

He's the only one here right now, but he has a feeling he's being watched. A glance round the side of the chair reveals no one in the corridor, only shadows, but he can't shake it off. It is not the sinister, creeping sensation of being studied and stalked like prey, more as though he's being observed, watched over by some benevolent guardian. His thoughts are drawn back to the console in the energon storage room, the way it'd blinked knowingly at him as if responding to his conversation with Chillwave and the others, and Afterburn eyes the computers in front of him thoughtfully. How coherent is Polaris, right now? Chillwave had mentioned it would probably take a couple of days for his consciousness to really come online, but this… he feels like he's being watched by something intelligent, and vastly so, not the sluggish security protocols of a Titan still half-dreaming.

For a little bit, he contemplates trying to speak to him, but can't think of anything to say. So he sits there, staring out the forward viewport as the stars drift by and sipping warm energon as he, too, drifts. Exhausted and over-worked, Afterburn is dimly aware he's entering the state somewhere between awake and blissful recharge, lulled by the calming oblivion of space, and amazingly, he almost falls asleep.

Then something very solid lands in his lap and brings him back to earth - it yelps at the same time Afterburn jumps, jolting back online, barely avoiding spilling his energon all over himself and— Chillwave, of course it is. Afterburn's free hand comes up to steady the other mech before he can tip backwards off the chair and crash to the floor.

"Primus, Afterburn, you can't do that to me! I thought you were— a zombie— I thought my spark was going to burst out of its casing," Chillwave breathes out, laying a hand over his chest plating dramatically. "My life flashed before my eyes. It was amazing."

"What, the captain can't sit in his own seat?" Afterburn asks jokingly. Chillwave grins at him but his face soon falls as he meets Afterburn's gaze and, presumably, sees something that troubles him. "Aren't you supposed to be recharging?" continues Afterburn in an attempt to distract him.

Chillwave makes an indignant noise and shoots back, "I slept for five hours; that's more than enough," as he gives Afterburn a meaningful prod in the chest. "And what about you? You look like you haven't slept at all." His hand shifts, fingertips splaying and palm pressing against the dark blue plating, feeling the strained, erratic pulse of a tired spark below the surface. Afterburn frowns and looks away, reluctant to speak about it even as the familiar bitterness rises in the back of his throat. Chillwave is his closest companion - he knows all of his secrets, all except what plagues him like this. Afterburn dreads to think how he might react if he found out everything is a lie— that he is a lie. It adds a deep guilt to the weight he's already carrying and he feels sick every time he has to think about it.

"Same as usual?" Chillwave probes gently when he isn't forthcoming, and after a second, Afterburn nods.

"Same as usual. Over-thinking, stressed out— the works."

"Steelheart does have that effect on people, what with his thing for explosions and… pissing everyone off, apparently. I'm still not sure what exactly he's done to get on everyone's bad side. But here you are, stressed out and still drinking regular mid-grade," Chillwave sighs as he plucks the cup from Afterburn's hand, taking a drink. "Way too high energy for you right now, chief. I know you feel like you need it, but that's not gonna help you recharge! I'll have this for breakfast though; thanks!" All of a sudden he's gone, hopping up and across the bridge to the energon dispenser. Afterburn watches him pour another cup then pull a couple of items from his subspace, chirping as he mixes the drink, "What you need is something more subdued - filling but with less of a zing. Add some osmium, water it down a little and… ta-da, tasty energon that'll fuel you up without over-energising."

Afterburn gratefully accepts the new drink, which is a little less luridly pink in colouration than Chillwave's and has been garnished with a sprinkling of blue-silver osmium slivers. He doesn't expect Chillwave to reclaim his previous seat in his lap but he doesn't complain - the weight and warmth of the mech's body against his own is surprisingly comforting despite his worries. He knows the soft purr of the seeker's engine as well as his own and his EM field is familiar, gentle and supporting like a hand on his shoulder; Afterburn feels their fields mesh almost without having to think about it and exhales a breath he didn't know he'd been holding, content for the first time in what feels like days. He feels calmer now, but then, Chillwave always has that effect on him.

Chillwave laughs and leans to bump his helm against Afterburn's. His free hand trails absently across his plating, touching just for the sake of touching, for that casual intimacy. "If this is what it takes to get you to relax, I'll start taking naps in your quarters. I'm good with cuddles!"

Wrapping an arm around his middle again, Afterburn pulls him closer and gives him a squeeze. "Maybe you should," he says fondly. They've recharged together before, it's not that unusual - actually, prior to this they'd spent several months curling up together whenever they needed to rest, and it occurs to Afterburn that a portion of his stress might be attributed to the fact that he missed that closeness. He was used to it - now sleeping alone is strange, cold, insecure.

As if he knows what he's thinking, Chillwave smiles at him with such intense and pure affection that Afterburn almost believes Chillwave wouldn't even care if he found out the truth. But the thought of losing that smile, that love, is terrifying almost beyond his comprehension.

Afterburn hopes it won't ever come to that.

» MISC
.
✥ He has a pretty strong spark, figuratively and literally, though he'd call himself weak. He has a lot of nightmares about his past failures, and a lot of regrets. With the amount of skeletons in his closet, perhaps that comes as no surprise.
✥ His insecurities cause him a good deal of stress but as he has a lot of control over his composure, the rest of the crew don't know it. Afterburn would rather it remain that way. He's afraid of messing up again, afraid of them finding out he's not the cool, calm, experienced leader they all think he is.
✥ Though most find him too harsh, Cauterize is one of the few who'll call him out when he makes a bad decision, and Afterburn is very glad for his council.
✥ He is better than he thinks he is.
✥ Chillwave is very very fond of him.

bio by electric #44246

xxxxxxx

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50k
01/09/16
ur so much brighter than what i
pictured for afterburn but it's fiNE

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Exalting Afterburn to the service of the Lightweaver will remove them from your lair forever. They will leave behind a small sum of riches that they have accumulated. This action is irreversible.

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