Caitlin

Cold, she thought. The cold was all she knew.

She felt trapped, the frost eating at the walls of her room, icicles growing across the roof, not making the slightest motion, as if it was frozen in place. And of course, the cold was coming from her.

She let out a bitter laugh.

When was the last time she felt the heat?

Warmth. The gnawing feeling in her stomach was becoming stronger with every second she let the cold out, the hunger for warmth, for being warm.. chilled her bones.

She looked at her fingers, caked with frost. Mist hung in the atmosphere, not willing to evaporate.

A part of her wanted to stop, to stop the growing ice crystals and to stop the cold. The other part of her wanted to embrace it, to feel the cold. To fuel her desire for warmth, to take the heat out of people, to fuel the empty void of coldness in her stomach, to finally feel warmth.

Could they blame her? She was perpetually cold, warmth merely just a dream. She tried everything. Nothing helped. Nothing could sate her desire. Cold bothered her.

She felt the part of her that wasn’t her whisper in her mind. Her eyes flickered from sky-blue to white, cold and unforgiving.

Unforgiving. The word echoed in her mind. Julian, the person who knew her secret and what her so-called good side invited onto the team, but still, she saw his glances — the stares, silently judging her for her actions. Barry, with the danger of Zoom over — playful smile back and cheerfully embracing his powers like how he did when he first gained them, speeding off just because he could .. but she saw the look in his eyes every time he saw her. The split-second fear, the moment’s flinch.. she saw the dread in his eyes. Afraid that she would turn out like Killer Frost.

After she discovered her powers, and after she came out with them, to her (kinda) makeshift family, she knew. She knew that they could never treat her the same way again, knowing that somewhere else within another Earth, there was another Caitlin Snow, but was a remorseless killer who fell to the wrath of Zoom.

She didn’t need to see their stares to know that. They were afraid. Afraid that she would turn out like her, afraid that she would turn into somebody.. that she wasn’t. That she couldn’t be.

And yet…
And yet…

The gnawing, the hunger to fuel her desire for warmth inside her grew with each day. She didn’t need to use her powers for it to grow. It just did.

Killer Frost was her inevitable destiny.

You should accept it… the cold, tingling voice in her head said, with an certain extent to cruelness to it.

And in that split second, she made a decision.

She wasn’t Caitlin Snow.

She was Killer Frost.