Dherkaln

I..I have family again... I have forgotten what it was like to have a family. The long years spent in Clan Iel, the sickness that hit my first family. My last children there, I never even knew their names. I should have gone back to them, stayed with them, died with them...But something inside me wouldn't allow it. So I fled.

I found Cloudy Zephyr. They were looking for a fighter to train their members, so I offered. I met Sariyah. She knew that I had a previous mate, but so had she, so there were no questions asked. We had a nest. They grew up and went off to new clans. She wanted more, but I was afraid. I kept thinking of my children with no names. I threw myself into fighting and training. Sariyah eventually left to serve the Windsinger. New guilt buried old guilt. And the years moved on.

My comrade in arms, Zhandou, has probably been the closest to family I've had in the years since Sariyah left. But now Kaiba, my firstson with Sariya, has come to live with us. Zhandou can sense my disconcertion but says nothing. Would that I could love her. But that would do her dishonor, she is the only one that knows my entire past. So I do not.