Okay everyone need a good laugh! Me even more, so i'm gonna start.
What if you worst critical fail you ever had in a role play game?
So there was that one game where we all started with semi hight lvl character. I take thief, because that's what i always pick. But to spice up the game we decided to all give a stupid fear to our character. Fear of dust for our warrior, fear of the dark for our healer... And of corse i pick fear of blood.
Our DM, who like to humor us a lot made us a nicely planed quest. I'm not even go say how hard it have been to get inside the dungeon, that was just sad. But at some point... We find the pit. It's not really deep, by the wall are hight enough to prevent anyone from climbing back up if we felt in it.
As the thief of the team, i walk forward to look down the dark pit with a torch. From the light of the fire we all discover at the same time what is painting the wall of that hole. Blood, dried blood. And some a bite more fresh. Oh corse, i'm scared of blood, so i roll the dice!
Aaaand i faint.
So my team had to find a way without me to cross the pit, with a dead weight. Of corse every turn i get to roll the dice to see if i wake up, wich don't happen until we crossed the pit of blood. And one of our team member, who had to draw my sorry *** over the pit turn toward me, who technically just woke up and scream.
''NOW WE ARE OVER IT DON'T LOOK AT THE BLOOD!''
So of corse. I had to look back in the pit. The other players all scream at me, asking me why i would do this!?!
''But... what do you do when someone ask you not to look?... Well you look anyway!'' So i rolled the dice and fainted again.
Okay everyone need a good laugh! Me even more, so i'm gonna start.
What if you worst critical fail you ever had in a role play game?
So there was that one game where we all started with semi hight lvl character. I take thief, because that's what i always pick. But to spice up the game we decided to all give a stupid fear to our character. Fear of dust for our warrior, fear of the dark for our healer... And of corse i pick fear of blood.
Our DM, who like to humor us a lot made us a nicely planed quest. I'm not even go say how hard it have been to get inside the dungeon, that was just sad. But at some point... We find the pit. It's not really deep, by the wall are hight enough to prevent anyone from climbing back up if we felt in it.
As the thief of the team, i walk forward to look down the dark pit with a torch. From the light of the fire we all discover at the same time what is painting the wall of that hole. Blood, dried blood. And some a bite more fresh. Oh corse, i'm scared of blood, so i roll the dice!
Aaaand i faint.
So my team had to find a way without me to cross the pit, with a dead weight. Of corse every turn i get to roll the dice to see if i wake up, wich don't happen until we crossed the pit of blood. And one of our team member, who had to draw my sorry *** over the pit turn toward me, who technically just woke up and scream.
''NOW WE ARE OVER IT DON'T LOOK AT THE BLOOD!''
So of corse. I had to look back in the pit. The other players all scream at me, asking me why i would do this!?!
''But... what do you do when someone ask you not to look?... Well you look anyway!'' So i rolled the dice and fainted again.
Okay so here I go.
Once upon a time I played a dwarf. Our team was in a dungeon and in one of the chests I found some stuff, I rolled to evaluate the worth of my new found treasure aaaaaaaand... crit fail. So this is how I came upon one of the rarest, toughest and most amazing metal ever; or so my character thought. In truth it was a 80 something pounds rock of scrap metal.
So, my dwarf carried it for a long time until he came upon a black smith to make the rock into an armour; the black smith managed to do an helmet and gauntlets which my dwarf wore until it was damaged beyond repair only after one battle. My dwarf then firmly believed that metal overrated and never wanted to hear of it ever again.
Okay so here I go.
Once upon a time I played a dwarf. Our team was in a dungeon and in one of the chests I found some stuff, I rolled to evaluate the worth of my new found treasure aaaaaaaand... crit fail. So this is how I came upon one of the rarest, toughest and most amazing metal ever; or so my character thought. In truth it was a 80 something pounds rock of scrap metal.
So, my dwarf carried it for a long time until he came upon a black smith to make the rock into an armour; the black smith managed to do an helmet and gauntlets which my dwarf wore until it was damaged beyond repair only after one battle. My dwarf then firmly believed that metal overrated and never wanted to hear of it ever again.
The one time I had actually played DnD was my painful fail.
My team and I were exploring a large hidden building that was apparently built on top of a dragon's skeleton. The hallways we were wandering through were very narrow, maybe 1-2 spaces? I can't remember. Anyways, our team found a room packed with monsters at the end of a hallway. We were lined up behind each other to take turns hitting the monsters. I was the bowman.
And I was put at the very end of the hallway.
One by one everyone in front of me took their turns. getting great rolls and kills. When it came to my turn, I rolled the dice.
I got 1.
I shot my teammate pointblank in the back and they passed out. they lost all their turns and they were slowly dying.
My DM was not pleased with me.
The one time I had actually played DnD was my painful fail.
My team and I were exploring a large hidden building that was apparently built on top of a dragon's skeleton. The hallways we were wandering through were very narrow, maybe 1-2 spaces? I can't remember. Anyways, our team found a room packed with monsters at the end of a hallway. We were lined up behind each other to take turns hitting the monsters. I was the bowman.
And I was put at the very end of the hallway.
One by one everyone in front of me took their turns. getting great rolls and kills. When it came to my turn, I rolled the dice.
I got 1.
I shot my teammate pointblank in the back and they passed out. they lost all their turns and they were slowly dying.
My DM was not pleased with me.
I played D&D once. We were meeting with a dragon and I had to make friends with it for some reason. Rolled a 1, it killed us all.
I played D&D once. We were meeting with a dragon and I had to make friends with it for some reason. Rolled a 1, it killed us all.
olly / 15
Hm.
Well I had a point where a colleague of mine (in game now) was ripping on my magical abilities and I go "hey!" and roll to do prestidigitation to throw some flames at her feet, just to make a point. I then roll nat 1 on it, so I myself catch fire and she just goes "see what I mean".
I'm pretty sure there's another one I'm forgetting... OH YES
So this was a sort of practice session before my first group, me and two others of the six people who were going to be there, plus the DM, using a part of a previous campaign he'd done so he didn't have to make things up too much. I feel the need to recant this tale in full.
Our job is basically "get to this place, kill the things, go." We decided among us to find a guide. Where better to talk to people than the tavern, right? So we go to the nearest pub, we find someone to talk to and they say "That place? Yeah, I know a guy, he'll be in this other bar down the docks, you can't miss him, he's got two peg legs and seaweed in his beard." So, off we go to the second tavern, and sure enough there's a guy there. I should clarify at this point we're relying on my phone for random numbers since this was sort of very off the cuff and didn't have dice on us.
So we find the guy, he's roaring drunk but agrees to take us to this place in his row boat, saying it's just a few hours down the coast. We get in, he passes out so the half orc splashes water on him to wake him up, and he's forgotten who we are and why we're here so he gets violent. I move to smack sense into him, and, sure enough, natural one. So this kinda works out as a limp tap on the back that just enrages him. The half orc then punches him half the length of the boat, knocks him clean out, I tip him overboard and he floats away with his peg legs breaking the surface of the water just like bobbing bobbing bobbing away. We go "Okay he said a few hours down the coast this way right? Let's do it." All the while the third party member is all like "YOU JUST KILLED AN OLD LEGLESS MAN FOR HIS BOAT YOU MONSTERS" and it was great.
We get there, this has taken a couple of hours, and the DM just starts slow clapping like "Well done, you FINALLY got there, you know what the group who actually did this campaign did? They bought a map." And we all felt rather dumb.
Hm.
Well I had a point where a colleague of mine (in game now) was ripping on my magical abilities and I go "hey!" and roll to do prestidigitation to throw some flames at her feet, just to make a point. I then roll nat 1 on it, so I myself catch fire and she just goes "see what I mean".
I'm pretty sure there's another one I'm forgetting... OH YES
So this was a sort of practice session before my first group, me and two others of the six people who were going to be there, plus the DM, using a part of a previous campaign he'd done so he didn't have to make things up too much. I feel the need to recant this tale in full.
Our job is basically "get to this place, kill the things, go." We decided among us to find a guide. Where better to talk to people than the tavern, right? So we go to the nearest pub, we find someone to talk to and they say "That place? Yeah, I know a guy, he'll be in this other bar down the docks, you can't miss him, he's got two peg legs and seaweed in his beard." So, off we go to the second tavern, and sure enough there's a guy there. I should clarify at this point we're relying on my phone for random numbers since this was sort of very off the cuff and didn't have dice on us.
So we find the guy, he's roaring drunk but agrees to take us to this place in his row boat, saying it's just a few hours down the coast. We get in, he passes out so the half orc splashes water on him to wake him up, and he's forgotten who we are and why we're here so he gets violent. I move to smack sense into him, and, sure enough, natural one. So this kinda works out as a limp tap on the back that just enrages him. The half orc then punches him half the length of the boat, knocks him clean out, I tip him overboard and he floats away with his peg legs breaking the surface of the water just like bobbing bobbing bobbing away. We go "Okay he said a few hours down the coast this way right? Let's do it." All the while the third party member is all like "YOU JUST KILLED AN OLD LEGLESS MAN FOR HIS BOAT YOU MONSTERS" and it was great.
We get there, this has taken a couple of hours, and the DM just starts slow clapping like "Well done, you FINALLY got there, you know what the group who actually did this campaign did? They bought a map." And we all felt rather dumb.
