any victims of narcissists around? | General Discussion

Hey! I'm not sure if anyone's tried to, or has made, a thread about this topic here before, but I looked around for one and havent seen any so;;;;

Are there any other victims of Narcs that play FR? There's a support group for ACoNs over on Reddit (and a smaller one on Tumblr.). I think it'd be nice to form a support group here, too.

Narcs/Narcissists are people who exhibit toxic, self absorbed, and abusive personality traits. They are pretty much everywhere, so honestly this isnt even just for children of narcs, but anyone who's been affected by a narc in their lives.

Nyne

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September 28, 2015 23:43:27

Hey! I'm not sure if anyone's tried to, or has made, a thread about this topic here before, but I looked around for one and havent seen any so;;;;

Are there any other victims of Narcs that play FR? There's a support group for ACoNs over on Reddit (and a smaller one on Tumblr.). I think it'd be nice to form a support group here, too.

Narcs/Narcissists are people who exhibit toxic, self absorbed, and abusive personality traits. They are pretty much everywhere, so honestly this isnt even just for children of narcs, but anyone who's been affected by a narc in their lives.

A N . I N J U R Y . T O . O N E
art shop | hatchery | theme song
I S . A N . I N J U R Y . T O . A L L

Last edited on Oct 10, 2015 15:02:30 by Nyne

@AlpineHell I don't think my parents qualify as narcisstic, though they are quite toxic, but my ex boyfriend definetly showed narcisstic traits and my therapist agreed with me. I went through hell in the almost two year long relationship with him and I still get flashbacks to the most horrible moments and have problems dealing with it.

So yeah I only have this quite short experience, but I'll gladly share my knowledge and I'm always open if people need someone to talk :)

Jua

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October 10, 2015 14:55:46

@AlpineHell I don't think my parents qualify as narcisstic, though they are quite toxic, but my ex boyfriend definetly showed narcisstic traits and my therapist agreed with me. I went through hell in the almost two year long relationship with him and I still get flashbacks to the most horrible moments and have problems dealing with it.

So yeah I only have this quite short experience, but I'll gladly share my knowledge and I'm always open if people need someone to talk :)

@Jua Toxic behavior can totally qualify someone as "narcissictic" - at least in this connotation, it's an umbrella kinda term here O: Very very good that you got away from a narc ex, though! lots of folks stay waaay too long, so very many hugs and kudos to you! :)

Nyne

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October 10, 2015 15:02:05

@Jua Toxic behavior can totally qualify someone as "narcissictic" - at least in this connotation, it's an umbrella kinda term here O: Very very good that you got away from a narc ex, though! lots of folks stay waaay too long, so very many hugs and kudos to you! :)

A N . I N J U R Y . T O . O N E
art shop | hatchery | theme song
I S . A N . I N J U R Y . T O . A L L

@AlpineHell

Ive had my suspicions for years that my mom is a narc (that and/or other things), shes pretty awful and it definitely takes a toll.

I think it's a really great idea to have a support group going though! :03

dogking

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October 10, 2015 15:06:30

@AlpineHell

Ive had my suspicions for years that my mom is a narc (that and/or other things), shes pretty awful and it definitely takes a toll.

I think it's a really great idea to have a support group going though! :03

@AlpineHell

I went to high school with one. He was probably one of the most evil people I've ever met, he molested one of my best friends. I freaked out and beat the **** out of him but he's one of those that never feels any remorse for his actions, and of course I was the one who got in trouble.

What bugs me is that he was in a school that was supposed to be for people on the Autism spectrum, but he wasn't Autistic at all, he was just a sociopath. He didn't have any of the traits common to kids with Autism and was socially very competent when it benefited him. He didn't need to be there and I'm still angry at the administration for ever letting him in.

Lesley

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October 10, 2015 15:20:05

@AlpineHell

I went to high school with one. He was probably one of the most evil people I've ever met, he molested one of my best friends. I freaked out and beat the **** out of him but he's one of those that never feels any remorse for his actions, and of course I was the one who got in trouble.

What bugs me is that he was in a school that was supposed to be for people on the Autism spectrum, but he wasn't Autistic at all, he was just a sociopath. He didn't have any of the traits common to kids with Autism and was socially very competent when it benefited him. He didn't need to be there and I'm still angry at the administration for ever letting him in.

I found stars on the tip of your tongue/You speak poltergeist and so do I

@AlpineHell my dad made me suffer for over 9 years, and a few weeks ago i told him screw the court order (the one that tells me i have to go back and forth between his house and my moms) and didnt go back :) plus some ppl at school are like that.

Squeebs

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October 10, 2015 15:42:50

@AlpineHell my dad made me suffer for over 9 years, and a few weeks ago i told him screw the court order (the one that tells me i have to go back and forth between his house and my moms) and didnt go back :) plus some ppl at school are like that.

I had made this on 7/11/2015
I obviously, do not edit this very often :P
https://discord.gg/nG5Ah4KpVR Please come and join us!

@AlpineHell oh, I thought that this was specifically about people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, that's why I said that I'm not sure if my parents qualify 'cause I don't know if their behaviour is "abnormal enough" to diagnose them with the disorder.

And yeah I was really quite lucky - in fact HE broke up, because "I was always crying, spacing out and having panic attacks and this made him feel bad and kinda like it's his fault". Guess what, it was your fault a**hole! But yeah it's always easier to ignore your own problematic behaviour instead of changing it.

I think I'd never have left him on my own, he just constantly lied to me, twisted my words, said that my perception was wrong, my feelings were wrong, that I was wrong, I was really starting to loose my sense of reality. I mean I suffered from PTSD even before we got together, but I never felt crazy until our relationship got serious. And he always said that everything was my fault, when I felt bad I was just being oversensitive, when he felt bad it was always because of something I did. I felt like he hated me, like he never wanted to actually have me, his girlfriend, around, but when I told him this he got angry and said that I'm wrong and how dare I question his feelings it was obvious that it was again just me misinterpreting and mispresenting his actions, he liked me (he actually never said that he loved me, it was always just "like") he really did, why did I not believe him?!

I did believe his words WAY too long, I believed his lies over his actions that were clearly abusive, but he always twisted it so much and made me the crazy one that gets everything wrong. I even blamed myself quite some time after he broke up with me and tried to win him back! I was like "look, I'm not crying anymore, I'm the fun, cool, non-feeling girlfriend you always wanted!" He did lead me on for some time, but after an incident were he hurt me extremely AND BLAMED ME AGAIN I refused to take the blame and kept saying that I didn't deserve what he did to me, I did everything he wanted and he still hurt me in this monstrous way and then he just broke off contact with me.

Though I still had stuff at his place and a few months later I wanted to get it back, but he openly threatened me this time. I was very affraid, but I went there anyway because he doesn't live alone (he has flatmates) so I could always scream for help when he did something. But I got my stuff back without further incidents, he just threatened me again. This was back in June.

Two weeks ago he wrote me on facebook like never anything happened, but I told him that I now see clearly and my therapist said I could sue him and I would if he didn't leave me alone. He just blocked me without an answer, which is an extremely mature response appropiate for his age (he's 31, I'm 20). Though this got me all nervous again.

Ugh I got all rambly... but maybe someone who reads this will recognize the pattern and seek help.

@Lesley: this is awful especially because abusive people just LOVE to take advantage of nauroatypical people, and someone might think autistics should be safe in a school just for them

@derpyhooves101: I'm glad you don't have to see your dad anymore, so congrats on that :D

Jua

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October 10, 2015 15:46:40

@AlpineHell oh, I thought that this was specifically about people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, that's why I said that I'm not sure if my parents qualify 'cause I don't know if their behaviour is "abnormal enough" to diagnose them with the disorder.

And yeah I was really quite lucky - in fact HE broke up, because "I was always crying, spacing out and having panic attacks and this made him feel bad and kinda like it's his fault". Guess what, it was your fault a**hole! But yeah it's always easier to ignore your own problematic behaviour instead of changing it.

I think I'd never have left him on my own, he just constantly lied to me, twisted my words, said that my perception was wrong, my feelings were wrong, that I was wrong, I was really starting to loose my sense of reality. I mean I suffered from PTSD even before we got together, but I never felt crazy until our relationship got serious. And he always said that everything was my fault, when I felt bad I was just being oversensitive, when he felt bad it was always because of something I did. I felt like he hated me, like he never wanted to actually have me, his girlfriend, around, but when I told him this he got angry and said that I'm wrong and how dare I question his feelings it was obvious that it was again just me misinterpreting and mispresenting his actions, he liked me (he actually never said that he loved me, it was always just "like") he really did, why did I not believe him?!

I did believe his words WAY too long, I believed his lies over his actions that were clearly abusive, but he always twisted it so much and made me the crazy one that gets everything wrong. I even blamed myself quite some time after he broke up with me and tried to win him back! I was like "look, I'm not crying anymore, I'm the fun, cool, non-feeling girlfriend you always wanted!" He did lead me on for some time, but after an incident were he hurt me extremely AND BLAMED ME AGAIN I refused to take the blame and kept saying that I didn't deserve what he did to me, I did everything he wanted and he still hurt me in this monstrous way and then he just broke off contact with me.

Though I still had stuff at his place and a few months later I wanted to get it back, but he openly threatened me this time. I was very affraid, but I went there anyway because he doesn't live alone (he has flatmates) so I could always scream for help when he did something. But I got my stuff back without further incidents, he just threatened me again. This was back in June.

Two weeks ago he wrote me on facebook like never anything happened, but I told him that I now see clearly and my therapist said I could sue him and I would if he didn't leave me alone. He just blocked me without an answer, which is an extremely mature response appropiate for his age (he's 31, I'm 20). Though this got me all nervous again.

Ugh I got all rambly... but maybe someone who reads this will recognize the pattern and seek help.

@Lesley: this is awful especially because abusive people just LOVE to take advantage of nauroatypical people, and someone might think autistics should be safe in a school just for them

@derpyhooves101: I'm glad you don't have to see your dad anymore, so congrats on that :D

Last edited on Oct 10, 2015 15:55:25 by Jua

@Jua thanks!~

Squeebs

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October 10, 2015 15:57:37

@Jua thanks!~

I had made this on 7/11/2015
I obviously, do not edit this very often :P
https://discord.gg/nG5Ah4KpVR Please come and join us!

@AlpineHell I've lived with one for all of my life :D Them being my mother.

She thought it was a good idea to shelter me for most of my life, and even when I've started to mature she pretty much [even though I've gone to uni a few hours away from where we lived] still thinks I need to be sheltered and coddled and she thinks I'm a child.

I'm 18 now, and she withheld some pretty important information before my 18th birthday. I'm a grown *** women. Stop coddling me and treat me like a human being and adult thanks. Oh wait you never will but I'm far away from you for mostly three years now so whatever :D

[She also tried to make me promise to come back for. ever. single. holiday. ever [halloween, easter etc] while I was attending Uni. I know I have to go up for christmas and I don't even know if I'll even go home for the weekend for my birthday next year. I'll go home and totally not be able to put up with her **** after living by myself and free from anything toxic :D]

TheBlackLily

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October 10, 2015 16:03:09

@AlpineHell I've lived with one for all of my life :D Them being my mother.

She thought it was a good idea to shelter me for most of my life, and even when I've started to mature she pretty much [even though I've gone to uni a few hours away from where we lived] still thinks I need to be sheltered and coddled and she thinks I'm a child.

I'm 18 now, and she withheld some pretty important information before my 18th birthday. I'm a grown *** women. Stop coddling me and treat me like a human being and adult thanks. Oh wait you never will but I'm far away from you for mostly three years now so whatever :D

[She also tried to make me promise to come back for. ever. single. holiday. ever [halloween, easter etc] while I was attending Uni. I know I have to go up for christmas and I don't even know if I'll even go home for the weekend for my birthday next year. I'll go home and totally not be able to put up with her **** after living by myself and free from anything toxic :D]

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@AlpineHell I was in a relationship with a man for almost 4 years and he fits the description of NPD to a T. Let's just say he was not very nice to me throughout. :O I'm seeing treatment for it now.

Toasted

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October 10, 2015 16:27:35

@AlpineHell I was in a relationship with a man for almost 4 years and he fits the description of NPD to a T. Let's just say he was not very nice to me throughout. :O I'm seeing treatment for it now.