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JaydeTheDragon I really hope you parents can become open minded and just love and support you for whoever u wanna be :3
My family is also slightly religious so I understand why that would be scary.
Thank you! <3
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JaydeTheDragon I really hope you parents can become open minded and just love and support you for whoever u wanna be :3
My family is also slightly religious so I understand why that would be scary.
Thank you! <3
https://www1.flightrising.com/forums/raf/3084436#post_3084436 Get yourself some free dragons before they go in goop mom’s goo
ahaha local enby here, Imma just put my two cents in so
- Honestly, I just want to exist as a person, and that's one of the big reasons why I identify as non-binary; it's kinda like if gender was a paint, mine would either be clear varnish or fade over time.
- Also, I felt the same way about the word "non-binary" as you described feeling when you discovered the term "genderfluid", it was nice and comforting in a familiar way.
- also, about dysphoria, I think there's like a couple of different types, as in social and physical? I'm pretty sure (but not certain) that social is "I hate she/her pronouns and the way I am perceived as female" and physical is "I wanna look more like a boy" although they do overlap quite a bit
ahaha local enby here, Imma just put my two cents in so
- Honestly, I just want to exist as a person, and that's one of the big reasons why I identify as non-binary; it's kinda like if gender was a paint, mine would either be clear varnish or fade over time.
- Also, I felt the same way about the word "non-binary" as you described feeling when you discovered the term "genderfluid", it was nice and comforting in a familiar way.
- also, about dysphoria, I think there's like a couple of different types, as in social and physical? I'm pretty sure (but not certain) that social is "I hate she/her pronouns and the way I am perceived as female" and physical is "I wanna look more like a boy" although they do overlap quite a bit
Hi! I can't exactly help you on the gender thing in a "are you genderfluid" way since I have no gender and feel completely removed from the concept of gender entirely, but I just want to mention that you don't need dysphoria to be trans! That's an outdated and harmful concept at this point, I'd suggest focusing more on what terms and such make you feel good, rather than trying to "justify" your identity. Being trans isn't about suffering!
Hi! I can't exactly help you on the gender thing in a "are you genderfluid" way since I have no gender and feel completely removed from the concept of gender entirely, but I just want to mention that you don't need dysphoria to be trans! That's an outdated and harmful concept at this point, I'd suggest focusing more on what terms and such make you feel good, rather than trying to "justify" your identity. Being trans isn't about suffering!
Not genderfluid, but I do have some thoughts on this dilemma and hope I can help.
Are you perhaps struggling with the toxic ideas society has about gender roles?
I ask because if I really, REALLY think about it, I'm not entirely sure what gender even *is*, and wonder if perhaps we are all, to some capacity, genderfluid.
I identify as a woman and was born as such, but I don't really act like a woman as society sees us. My other half doesn't act like a man as society sees them. I'm not a tender, sensitive, dramatic creature and he is not a macho, aggressive, emotionless creature.
I am not "ladylike". He is not "manly". We feel at home in our own skin, we just grew up largely removed from the silly ideas about how we should act because of our biology. We were allowed to be humans instead of being told to be girls and boys, and as a result I feel like...maybe my gender is just neutral? Because I adhere to basically nothing "womanly", but I definitely don't feel like I'm a man. None of my behaviors are "female", they are human. All humans can be nurturing, all humans cry, all humans can be sensitive, all humans can be aggressive, etc. There is no behavior in our arsenal that I can say is 100% sexually dimorphic on an inherent level. Any behavior that's classically one or the other is behavior reinforced by toxic social ideas, imho.
I'm rambling, lol, but basically...I just don't think gender is something we can pin down with any accuracy as a textbook term, and how you feel is VALID no matter who you are, so embrace it and explore it. Your idenity is your right to define, and it seems like maybe your answers are within you. Other people's experiences with their own identities can only offer you a shadow of what yours may be.
Dive into it!
Not genderfluid, but I do have some thoughts on this dilemma and hope I can help.
Are you perhaps struggling with the toxic ideas society has about gender roles?
I ask because if I really, REALLY think about it, I'm not entirely sure what gender even *is*, and wonder if perhaps we are all, to some capacity, genderfluid.
I identify as a woman and was born as such, but I don't really act like a woman as society sees us. My other half doesn't act like a man as society sees them. I'm not a tender, sensitive, dramatic creature and he is not a macho, aggressive, emotionless creature.
I am not "ladylike". He is not "manly". We feel at home in our own skin, we just grew up largely removed from the silly ideas about how we should act because of our biology. We were allowed to be humans instead of being told to be girls and boys, and as a result I feel like...maybe my gender is just neutral? Because I adhere to basically nothing "womanly", but I definitely don't feel like I'm a man. None of my behaviors are "female", they are human. All humans can be nurturing, all humans cry, all humans can be sensitive, all humans can be aggressive, etc. There is no behavior in our arsenal that I can say is 100% sexually dimorphic on an inherent level. Any behavior that's classically one or the other is behavior reinforced by toxic social ideas, imho.
I'm rambling, lol, but basically...I just don't think gender is something we can pin down with any accuracy as a textbook term, and how you feel is VALID no matter who you are, so embrace it and explore it. Your idenity is your right to define, and it seems like maybe your answers are within you. Other people's experiences with their own identities can only offer you a shadow of what yours may be.
Dive into it!
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Horror aesthetic/lore lair
Weird goblin hermit
She/Her
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Massive Horror fan
Gamer
Writer
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Hi! I think it's actually a very complicated conversation especially if your assigned sex is female.
Statistically women are much more often victims of violence. (heavy and potentially triggering read talking about some worldwide statistics)
https://www.unwomen.org/en/what-we-do/ending-violence-against-women/facts-and-figures
This isn't just in the workplace, it's in many aspects of life, in games, in movies, in television.
Growing up as someone assigned at birth as a woman is also very hard, because we deal with unique and scary situation, r_pe, childbirth, pms, abortion, objectification. (on a statistically significantly higher scale) These are all things both women and those assigned at birth as being women have to deal with.
That is to say, especially right now? It's scary to be a woman and I can't imagine growing up now doing it without feeling even more confused then I had been when I was young. I had a lot of issues regarding my body and self image and identity but a lot of that actually came from abuse that I had experienced and how people treated me both as a woman and a black woman.
I don't think anyone can really help you find yourself, I think all we can do is try to support you in your journey to do so. If you're not comfortable with the exclusivity of calling yourself a woman I understand. If you feel safer expressing yourself as genderfluid I think that's okay and you also don't have to make any choices about it right now either,
you can choose what's most comfortable for you right now and work it out another time.
Because your experiences could be as complicated as not being or not entirely identifying with being a woman but they can also be
a universal experience that we deal with that makes it really hard for us due to sexism, abuse and objectification because we are women With that in mind being assigned female could be hard for many reasons that are very personal to you.
But it can also be hard for many reasons involving the world as well.
But this is why it's complicated. Because with how things are in the world right now for women? There aren't many benefits to being one when it comes to safety, when it comes to being treated equally, when it comes to finding love.
It's important to remember that we will support you to be however you are, or what ever identity you are. But that's why it's especially hard to say, because being a woman can be really, really hard. Especially if you are younger.
Hi! I think it's actually a very complicated conversation especially if your assigned sex is female.
Statistically women are much more often victims of violence. (heavy and potentially triggering read talking about some worldwide statistics)
https://www.unwomen.org/en/what-we-do/ending-violence-against-women/facts-and-figures
This isn't just in the workplace, it's in many aspects of life, in games, in movies, in television.
Growing up as someone assigned at birth as a woman is also very hard, because we deal with unique and scary situation, r_pe, childbirth, pms, abortion, objectification. (on a statistically significantly higher scale) These are all things both women and those assigned at birth as being women have to deal with.
That is to say, especially right now? It's scary to be a woman and I can't imagine growing up now doing it without feeling even more confused then I had been when I was young. I had a lot of issues regarding my body and self image and identity but a lot of that actually came from abuse that I had experienced and how people treated me both as a woman and a black woman.
I don't think anyone can really help you find yourself, I think all we can do is try to support you in your journey to do so. If you're not comfortable with the exclusivity of calling yourself a woman I understand. If you feel safer expressing yourself as genderfluid I think that's okay and you also don't have to make any choices about it right now either,
you can choose what's most comfortable for you right now and work it out another time.
Because your experiences could be as complicated as not being or not entirely identifying with being a woman but they can also be
a universal experience that we deal with that makes it really hard for us due to sexism, abuse and objectification because we are women With that in mind being assigned female could be hard for many reasons that are very personal to you.
But it can also be hard for many reasons involving the world as well.
But this is why it's complicated. Because with how things are in the world right now for women? There aren't many benefits to being one when it comes to safety, when it comes to being treated equally, when it comes to finding love.
It's important to remember that we will support you to be however you are, or what ever identity you are. But that's why it's especially hard to say, because being a woman can be really, really hard. Especially if you are younger.
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Zosimos I have thought about not even putting a label on myself since labels often restrict things but then again I don’t know xD It’s so incredibly hard to describe my feelings (in general) I think I might have body dysphoria (which has nothing to do with gender) more so me thinking I’m too fat/ugly/etc which I don’t always feel that way towards myself but occasionally do
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PaintmasterSheo I know, though I don’t think I would exactly call myself trans because the thought of just being a man doesn’t make me happy the thought of being a female or a male or even non-binary at any given time makes me happy (at least when I think about it) Though I’m not too sure of things yet! Thank you :3 and I wasn’t asking people to determine what I am per say just give advice or their own experiences heck even just kind words would be appreciated <3
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GrimoireBlack I know there is not just one type of female and one type of male since when I was younger (and even a bit now) I wasn’t what society thinks of as a typical female, but hopefully as we progress into the future people can look past stereotypes and things such as that. Thank you! <3
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Monako The world is a very scary place especially for women, I should know because I’ve had experiences that have always left a chill in my spine. Being catcalled or even approached by older men while outside alone ever since I was 14. Which is scary. I feel like every women has that fear in the back of their mind, to combat that I started doing Taekwondo as a means that one day I might have to defend myself, though I really hope it will never come to that. (The death of Ruth Baderginsburg was even more tragic since she fought so much for women’s rights) I might just not put a label on my gender per say and just be whoever makes me feel safest and at home within myself. I really do hope in the future that this world can be a safe place for everyone, no matter gender, sexuality, race, religion, etc. I only hope that things don’t get worse then they already have. Thank you <3
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Zosimos I have thought about not even putting a label on myself since labels often restrict things but then again I don’t know xD It’s so incredibly hard to describe my feelings (in general) I think I might have body dysphoria (which has nothing to do with gender) more so me thinking I’m too fat/ugly/etc which I don’t always feel that way towards myself but occasionally do
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PaintmasterSheo I know, though I don’t think I would exactly call myself trans because the thought of just being a man doesn’t make me happy the thought of being a female or a male or even non-binary at any given time makes me happy (at least when I think about it) Though I’m not too sure of things yet! Thank you :3 and I wasn’t asking people to determine what I am per say just give advice or their own experiences heck even just kind words would be appreciated <3
@
GrimoireBlack I know there is not just one type of female and one type of male since when I was younger (and even a bit now) I wasn’t what society thinks of as a typical female, but hopefully as we progress into the future people can look past stereotypes and things such as that. Thank you! <3
@
Monako The world is a very scary place especially for women, I should know because I’ve had experiences that have always left a chill in my spine. Being catcalled or even approached by older men while outside alone ever since I was 14. Which is scary. I feel like every women has that fear in the back of their mind, to combat that I started doing Taekwondo as a means that one day I might have to defend myself, though I really hope it will never come to that. (The death of Ruth Baderginsburg was even more tragic since she fought so much for women’s rights) I might just not put a label on my gender per say and just be whoever makes me feel safest and at home within myself. I really do hope in the future that this world can be a safe place for everyone, no matter gender, sexuality, race, religion, etc. I only hope that things don’t get worse then they already have. Thank you <3
https://www1.flightrising.com/forums/raf/3084436#post_3084436 Get yourself some free dragons before they go in goop mom’s goo
I identified as genderfluid for a while, maybe a year or two, because I was struggling with the idea of being trans. Yet when I actually looked at how I felt, I didn't have some days when I felt like a guy and some when I felt like a woman. I always either felt like a guy, or felt utterly numb and disconnected. The only fluidity there was the severity of my mental health problems caused by gender dysphoria. So over time, I realised I wasn't genderfluid at all, I was just a guy that often felt completely disconnected from both life and my body because my body was wrong.
I will also note that I strongly object to Monako's insinuation that people stop identifying as women because it's hard to be a woman. That's not a million miles away from the common TERF assumption that trans men and AFAB non-binary people are just confused women trying to escape from misogyny. We're not. We know who we are, and it is nothing to do with how women are treated in society. It's everything to do with not being women in the first place. I don't know if Monako intended to repeat TERF rhetoric, but that's how it came out.
I identified as genderfluid for a while, maybe a year or two, because I was struggling with the idea of being trans. Yet when I actually looked at how I felt, I didn't have some days when I felt like a guy and some when I felt like a woman. I always either felt like a guy, or felt utterly numb and disconnected. The only fluidity there was the severity of my mental health problems caused by gender dysphoria. So over time, I realised I wasn't genderfluid at all, I was just a guy that often felt completely disconnected from both life and my body because my body was wrong.
I will also note that I strongly object to Monako's insinuation that people stop identifying as women because it's hard to be a woman. That's not a million miles away from the common TERF assumption that trans men and AFAB non-binary people are just confused women trying to escape from misogyny. We're not. We know who we are, and it is nothing to do with how women are treated in society. It's everything to do with not being women in the first place. I don't know if Monako intended to repeat TERF rhetoric, but that's how it came out.
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Ruan The thing with me is I know I don’t want to be just a male yet still feel empty when I am a female. The idea of being both a female, male, or nb at any given time makes me relaxed. I’m 99% positive I am not trans, since the thought of being just a man makes me feel the exact same way as me thinking about being just a woman.
Also I don’t think Monako’s intention was to say some people want to stop being a female due to the many things some women can go through. (I honestly don’t know why they included that part but I don’t think it was for that reason)
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Ruan The thing with me is I know I don’t want to be just a male yet still feel empty when I am a female. The idea of being both a female, male, or nb at any given time makes me relaxed. I’m 99% positive I am not trans, since the thought of being just a man makes me feel the exact same way as me thinking about being just a woman.
Also I don’t think Monako’s intention was to say some people want to stop being a female due to the many things some women can go through. (I honestly don’t know why they included that part but I don’t think it was for that reason)
https://www1.flightrising.com/forums/raf/3084436#post_3084436 Get yourself some free dragons before they go in goop mom’s goo
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Ruan Hi Ruan, please don't misunderstand my points. I was not saying that trans men or those who are non-binary are confused women. I was saying being
assigned as a woman at birth is hard, and that being a woman is hard and that when you're young it can be a complicated situation to try and find yourself.
I was not saying trans men or those who are non-binary are confused they know who they are and have already found themselves. I was saying if you
SAY you're not certain what your identity is, and you don't know it that the journey to finding that identity can be really hard if you are assigned as a woman at birth.
Trans men are men, someone who is non-binary is non binary. But to imply that the journey wasn't harder by being assigned wrongly does not help making that journey any easier.
(I have to go to class or I'd talk about this a bit more in depth. you don't have to respond of course but no, I don't doubt someone's sexuality or gender! but Squiggie asked for input about finding their/her identity and I said it was complicated because that can make it harder and take a bit longer.)
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squiggie Thank you, that was not what I was trying to say so I really appreciate you saying something.
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Ruan Hi Ruan, please don't misunderstand my points. I was not saying that trans men or those who are non-binary are confused women. I was saying being
assigned as a woman at birth is hard, and that being a woman is hard and that when you're young it can be a complicated situation to try and find yourself.
I was not saying trans men or those who are non-binary are confused they know who they are and have already found themselves. I was saying if you
SAY you're not certain what your identity is, and you don't know it that the journey to finding that identity can be really hard if you are assigned as a woman at birth.
Trans men are men, someone who is non-binary is non binary. But to imply that the journey wasn't harder by being assigned wrongly does not help making that journey any easier.
(I have to go to class or I'd talk about this a bit more in depth. you don't have to respond of course but no, I don't doubt someone's sexuality or gender! but Squiggie asked for input about finding their/her identity and I said it was complicated because that can make it harder and take a bit longer.)
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squiggie Thank you, that was not what I was trying to say so I really appreciate you saying something.
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squiggle Hey uh!!! I’m an agender dude and I can try to offer advice even tho it isn’t totally the same.
It sounds like genderfluid might fit a lot for you, I’d try to keep using the label. If not though there’s plenty of identities you can try out I’m sure and lots of NB identities to choose from, I can help you with that if it’s needed.
Also semi replying to someone I have blocked in this thread only because I see others’ responses to them; you don’t /need/ dysphoria to be trans, there’s many other factors why someone would want to transition, it’s a big deal, but in the end it’s about you being comfy with your identity! Don’t worry about “faking,” just be true to yourself and what matters is that people respect you in the end. This community shouldn’t be fighting about how much you personally suffer with something deciding your validity, people simply need to be more kind and considerate.
I have dysphoria big time and I don’t feel like people without it are harming me
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squiggle Hey uh!!! I’m an agender dude and I can try to offer advice even tho it isn’t totally the same.
It sounds like genderfluid might fit a lot for you, I’d try to keep using the label. If not though there’s plenty of identities you can try out I’m sure and lots of NB identities to choose from, I can help you with that if it’s needed.
Also semi replying to someone I have blocked in this thread only because I see others’ responses to them; you don’t /need/ dysphoria to be trans, there’s many other factors why someone would want to transition, it’s a big deal, but in the end it’s about you being comfy with your identity! Don’t worry about “faking,” just be true to yourself and what matters is that people respect you in the end. This community shouldn’t be fighting about how much you personally suffer with something deciding your validity, people simply need to be more kind and considerate.
I have dysphoria big time and I don’t feel like people without it are harming me