Fluorite

Mar/10/15,
Nothing seems to change. I feel as though I can never fit in anywhere, not since the day I hatched. First, it was my love of studying the workings of the world that excluded me from my playmates. Hundreds of miles later, in the Labyrinth, it was my fear of being a father—to this day, my abandonment of my children has haunted me. Now, in this Shadow clan, my studies have landed me with a terrible diagnosis. I can't seem to remember anything outside of the past thirty seconds. My life before the Tangled Wood is clear. But I can't seem to make any new memories. I'll people my discoveries about the different species of brush here four times in the span of an hour simply because I can't remember telling them the first time.

A few individuals tolerate me well enough even after the accident yesterday (or so I'm told it was yesterday; a rotting log seemed to have snapped and landed on my head during one of my nature hikes). But I feel like I should leave. I don't feel like I fit in, just as I hadn't in my original clan. Oh, if only I could show my face around the Viridian Labyrinth again… but surely Terezi will never forgive me. The kids, too… They've probably already forgotten about me. I'm such a

I'd better keep a few leaves of paper handy from now on. Shouldn't be too hard with this thick, heavy tome of mine. Constant reminders and notes will be necessary now, for everything I see and hear and think about. The medic also wrote me a note that says I can remove my bandage in a few days, and to drink plenty of feverfew tea for my headaches. Oh, the throbbing, I wish it would stop. It will stop in a few days, I know, but it's so difficult to manage even now.

I must pack up the rest of my notes and be off. I shall write again when I reach a new place.